Spirituality

Grace, humility and patience

I’d say these three values have been tested and strengthened the most over these past two and half months my dear readers. I’ve written here many times that I firmly believe that God brings us to everything He knows we can live through. Period. The less we resist the challenges life presents to us the easier it is to integrate these values into our character. Surrender. Release. Let go. This too has been a focused mantra of mine. Forgive me my dears, for I never want to portray any of this as being easy yet the concept is simple. With daily intentions and practice, we all have the ability to manifest a life beyond our wildest dreams! I am living proof of that my dear readers.

I have been thoroughly enjoying this holiday (in the U.S. we are celebrating Memorial Day) and because it’s been raining off and on ALL weekend, I have spent my time bingeing some Netflix documentaries and mini-series. The one that really grabbed my heart is called, “Unorthodox” about a young women’s life as she grows up in the Hasidic community and ultimately discovers that their world is not for her as she leaves to discover her own true path. The parallels I drew to my own life, healing and self discovery were quite evident in each of the four parts of this series. The main character, Esty, definitely had to learn to show herself some grace while being patient enough with herself to discover her place in this world. I believe the humility she already possesses as a young women in her ultra Orthodox Jewish faith helped her a lot as she forges through the many obstacles of leaving the only place she has ever lived and travels to Berlin, Germany. This is a true story written by a woman who actually did just that in hopes of uncovering her true authentic self. From the very beginning she even tells the man who is to become her husband by means of an arranged marriage that she isn’t like the other girls, she is different.

For those of you who have been reading my blog here, I too have expressed that I have always felt different from my peers. The black sheep of my family. Many of the scenes like the one of her bathing in the kosher bath as a way of purifying her body before her marriage resonated deeply with me. Her attempts at being reborn through becoming sub servant to her new husband in order to birth his children and repopulate the world with more Jewish people in order to make up for the millions lost in Holocaust is both selfless and remarkedly relatable because I believe we all experience some level of dysfunction in our lives. It’s meant to serve a purpose I believe in deciding what we ourselves believe in and are committed to carrying on with or what we decide isn’t part of our belief system and should be left aside. I don’t mean any disrespect to this community, that isn’t my intention with this post. My heart in many ways related to and broke for Esty because she was forced into many situations that were not her own choice. God has given all us free will and we come into this world as sovereign beings yet because of societal conditioning are thrust into certain circumstances and situations not of our own choosing. There in lies the dysfunction.

Coming to terms with own beliefs and forging a life we can truly be ourselves in is crucial to happiness. I myself have lived most of my adult life in an inauthentic way. Doing things to make others happy in hopes of gaining acceptance and love no matter if I was hurting myself in the process. After Esty makes friends with a group of musicians and is finally feeling accepted, one of them tells her some truths that were both necessary yet hard for her to swallow. Again, such is life. Are you my dear readers telling people things just to appease them, be accepted or make them feel happy yet not exposing them to the real truth of a situation in order to spare their feelings? Wow. That one hit close to home. I have often been the bearer of bad news so to speak because I am honest to a fault at times and don’t always sugarcoat my words. I have also been on the receiving end of such harshness and now reflecting back upon those situations, I’m thankful for them. Definitely a shift to how I viewed those situations at the time but isn’t that also another beautiful part of life? The mystery and discovery of what certain things are meant to teach us over our time here on Earth. Our opinions and judgements, perspectives and perceptions can completely shift. I believe just as life itself is, all things are relative and cyclical.

In that part of the story, even though she felt sad she ended up changing her entire approach for her audition in Hope’s of obtaining a scholarship she was yearning to get to a prestigious music academy. That is the very essence of all of life’s choices my dear readers. We can learn from these setbacks, shift and go in a conpletely different direction or we can take on a victim mentality and allow whatever hardship to destroy us, quit which in the long run turns into a resentment. Allowing others to cast judgements that we then use to disempower ourselves is a hard reality to face down the road. Believe me, I have lived through many situations and circumstances that I don’t regret now but at the time wished I had handled differently.

Everything that has happened thus far is truly a blessing and being able to admit that fully is real growth. By living with a false sense of reality, we only hurt ourselves. Up until this part in the story, Esty has faced so much rejection. Mostly within herself yet she keeps courageously plugging along trying to make her dreams come true. When her hopes seem lost, she calls her Grandma, her bubby and the woman who raised her and because the fear of being cast out by the community is too great, her bubby hangs up the phone on her. Again, Esty must decide if that setback will crush her and force her back to the only home she has ever known. Ultimately we are shown that she has the bravery it takes to keep going despite it all. Even when all the chips are down, she finds the strength to keep believing in herself. She wants a better future for herself and her unborn child. That part really struck a chord with me as a mother and somebody that has felt like a failure for so long.

This year has been one of complete transformation and rebirth for me on all levels. As a mother, partner, daughter, sister, friend and most importantly as a woman. Rediscovering myself and remembering what my purpose here in life is has been the most beautiful, painful, tedious and challenging experience of my life thus far. I’m grateful to have discovered what I call my soul language and my true authentic voice. I wrote this poem as a way of expressing that.

I have also started my apprenticeship to become a shamanic healer and in doing so I had some “homework” to commit to doing. I did a lot of sitting with myself, talking openly to God and spirit. Communicating with the spirit animals that resonate with me, learning about tree spirits…..stuff like that. I know many of you probably think as my partner does that that’s totally weird and a foreign feeling activity for you personally. It’s all part of my own journey however and I fully embrace it! God has brought me here to a place of learning more about why I have these extra sensory perceptions and gifts. My path is truly my own and in discovering more about myself I have been given this message. The following poem sums everything up quite well. This is where I find myself and I am eternally grateful to be awake, alive and present for the present that God has given me! Peace, love and light my dear readers….love yourself and one another.

Please check out my 2 books of poetry available now on Amazon at the links below.

Spirituality

Every day is a gift

This post is going to be a bit different than my other posts my dear readers. This one a journal entry, a peak into my inner world.

Opening my eyes this morning, I greet the day with enthusiasm and curiosity for what God has in store for me. What lesson will I learn today and what experience will touch my soul. These are my first thoughts as I reach for the book I read every day, Mark Nepo’s “The Book of Awakening.” I like to use whatever he reflects upon in the daily passage for my own journal prompt. A mix of where I find myself in the moment and a pearl of his wisdom. I usually write my entry afterwards. Here’s today’s entry:

Breaking patterns and strengthening bonds is the work at hand. Yesterday went so well with Lindsey, my heart feels so full! Ty and I enjoyed a wonderful afternoon together. He treated me to dinner.  Even my partner surprised me with a sweet present that I wasn’t expecting, the best kind of gift! I know since arriving here at my parent’s house, me energy has been unsettled. Showing myself grace while being gentle, I will figure out what feels best here. Of course I have my lounge chair set up outside by the lake, my happy place. It’s where I can observe nature, speak with God and receive messages from my spirit guides. I told Lindsey that as a “homework” practice this week for my apprenticeship to become a Shamanic healer, I will reestablish my self journeying which plainly means I will be intentional about spending more time solo outdoors, in self reflection. I have to feel my way through because that’s my best asset and my strongest sense as an empath. God, please help me to learn my place here and lead with love in every endeavor, especially as it concerns others. Thank you for bringing me this far along my journey. Thank you for helping me heal by recognizing the truth and knowing the beauty you provide for us here on Earth. I’m grateful for the focus I have in following my soul’s path and purpose. I trust that you have brought me here because I’m ready to learn more and what a gift that is! God and your helpers, the angels surrounding me, are continuing to help me heal. Continuing to walk this path in truth and love isn’t a responsibility I take lightly. It’s only with the courage and love you God provide me that I have gotten through the darkness. For in darkness, I have discovered myself and gathered the strength I needed to walk into the light. It brings tears to my eyes when I can sit in meditation and feel the beauty of everything here you have created in every living thing. Each and every day is a gift!

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My dear readers, treat each and every day as the gift it is. God will only bring you to and through what you can handle. Trust in Him. Live each day to the fullest my dears for life is precious. From my heart to your heart. So much ❤

Please check out my 2 books of poetry, links below……

Spirituality

Lately

It’s been a rough week for me my dear readers. Obviously with what’s going on in our world and being an intuitive empath, I have been picking up on all the feelings and emotional energy of others. The following are a few quick videos of me and lastly a poem I just finished. My hope for us all.

Outside thoughts 🍃

Feelin more like myself. Taking each day as it comes. This morning as I sat in meditation, I started sobbing. Not necessarily tears of sadness or joy just a release, a  non judgemental one that took days to flow through me. It’s important to allow whatever is coming up….be it energetically, emotionally, physically or spiritually…..resist the urge to shut it down, numb out or dissociate from it. It’s all normal right now y’all. We are ALL TOGETHER AS A WORLD experiencing major life changes.

I love you all and am sending out the purest of loving intentions from my ❤ to your ❤


Brighter than yesterday 🌞

This is my latest mantra for peace, health and unity for all of us right now. For our world🌎❤🦋🙏😊✌

I hope 🙏

As always, much love❤🌎✌

Spirituality

Staying in the love vibration

Not matter the current circumstances my dear readers, I am choosing to reject all of the fear being pumped into our society currently. Despite the fact that it is Friday the 13th and the Coronavirus is threatening the health of millions, billions throughout all of humanity……keep in the love vibe. Please. Love is the highest and most powerful of all energy vibrations ❤

Here are eight helpful tips you can practice to keep love running through your mind, body and spirit 🥰

  1. Become conscious of your thoughts. Everything you think, say or feel becomes your reality. We truly are our thoughts💭
  2. Find something beautiful and appreciate it. I do this through meditation and visualization.
  3. Be conscious of the foods you eat. Again, you are what you eat.
  4. Drink water and plenty of it. It’s the best way to rid the body of toxins
  5. Meditate. For at least 5 to 15 minutes every day. It’s a muscle that can be built over time, repetition and practice. I have been incorporating meditation into my daily routine for 10 years now and practicing yoga for 20. It’s never perfect but is progress in keeping myself balanced and centered 🧘‍♀️
  6. Be grateful. Especially with yourself. Show others kindness and practice the Golden Rule: Treat others as you would want to be treated🙌
  7. Practice acts of kindness. Both random and intentional, our world needs this now more than ever✌
  8. Get your blood pumping by moving your body for at least 20 minutes daily. Why not smile while doing it too….studies show that smiling while exercising has an even more beneficial impact on your overall health in the long term 😁

No matter what, reject all fear. Stay in the love vibration ❤🙌


This morning my creative mind wanted to play around with different types of poetry formats. Tapping into my passionate heart and my ability to empathize, using compassion to understand humanity. My message here is to love one another now more than ever❤


Spirituality

Super Sagittarius and my upcoming project

I was born under a new moon and have both Sun & Moon in Sagittarius. Plus Venus, which governs our value system, pleasures and influences my charm, gracefulness and beauty…..mostly my heart’s desires😉
I also have Neptune in Sagittarius which is where I get my optimism and generosity from😉

I am considered a Super Sagittarius 💜♐
Thank you #earthboundtrading for this gorgeous constellation of Sagittarius barrette! Also this sweet aura bead meant to amplify my energy💜♐

Sagittarius constellation

Right now I’m going to give you a bit more information on the project I teased about in my last post about my professional photoshoot. I am so pleased my the response to my pictures and really damn happy I was taking them. I’m celebrating me🎉🥰

I told you my dear readers that I had them done for multiple reasons and the first upcoming project I just sent off, thankfully, was a real doozy!! I was asked to give an interview for a local magazine here in Dallas, TX that features upcoming people to watch in and around the city. When I first read the email I was so taken aback that I thought somebody was punking me🤣

Recognition in my inbox😊

What you may not know dear readers is that I unfortunately don’t own a laptop. I punch out this blog and my first book’s manuscript from my crappy Android cell phone. Where there’s a will there’s a way I always say💪😉 So on Monday night when I first received the final prints I was so excited to jump on this link and start answering the interview questions. Now, I have commented on some of my fellow blogger’s posts how I am not super tech savvy having to figure out things myself is hard and it is very time consuming but I will never let that stop me…..just a lil venting session is ok, right🤪 you know what I mean V at https://millenniallifecrisis.org/

There were 12 sections to complete, the first 5 were direct questions about my story, how I started and got to where I am today, was the path to success clear (if you’ve been reading my blog from the beginning you know my struggles and all about my uphill battles) if I think good luck or bad luck influences me, what sets me apart from other people, what am I most proud of accomplishing so far….damn it I just remembered I forgot to incorporate the poetry slams I have attended so far this year. Opps!!

Well, the reason for my absentmindedness is because I shouldn’t have started working so late at night while my mind was too tired. I became distracted by a notification, one of the frustrating reasons that pop up because I work from my phone, dragged down the screen without saving anything first and BAM….2 hours of writing gone.

Thankfully, Tuesday I was off from work so I woke up excited to start again except this time I thought I would try using the laptop inside my partner’s Mother’s house. We live in an in law suite in the back. She has an older laptop that I unfortunately spilled coffee on last year while I was babysitting our little nephew😐 so it tends to have a mind of it’s own. The WiFi signal in it has always been weak, when Mama came walking through the back room I was in she made a comment on how she was surprised it was working. I believe she inadvertently jinxed me because soon after that, the computer just died! It kept going through this annoying self repair feature and it wouldn’t allow me to log back onto the internet because the WiFi signal was completely dead. This time I had invested 6 hours of work so needless to say I was pretty upset. I told my partner that I would resume work on it today, Thursday and we walked to the local corner store for a beer to calm my nerves🍺

I should add in here that I always get extra emotional a week before my time of the month. I have PMDD, premenstrual dysphoric disorder, which makes my mind loopy, I misunderstand things and tend to process information differently. I am already a HSP yet I become even more so during this time because light, sounds and my internal temperature thermometer is up and down…..making me feel hot and then cold….yes and no…..Katy Perry in my head now 🙄

Last night I came home frustrated from work and I used that slow burning anger to keep me up all night until I finished and submitted the entire interview. I banged out another 6 hours!! I must say however, I feel relieved. Like a monkey is off my back. I am not of fan of deadlines, time management and the like. I live my life in a spontaneous do what I feel like kinda way most of the time if I can help it however of course I do have to adhere to a schedule because I understand that there is only so much time in the day. My conditioning and ego try to pull me back and keep me safe but I am determined to keep growing, evolving, recognizing, shifting where neccessary and always radically accepting. I am flawed, I am human and I love me despite it all🥰

The article should be published in a few weeks and I will definitely share it with you my dear readers. Peace out✌

Spirituality

I Am

Seeking

Who am I is the reoccurring question throughout my entire life. It has haunted me, left me distraught, distracted and then exhilarated and finally an inner peace that compares to nothing else. The search for self and one’s purpose is so crucial to happiness. I’m in a good space finally. Peace, love & life✌❤