Consciousness, Healing, relationships, Spirituality

Traveling into new emotional experiences, guided by soul

Welcome to the next few months of Summer my dear readers. I love the Sun, its ability to energize my being and amplify my upbeat personality. In this post I will share what I’ve learned this month while traveling the path of soul. My daily healing practices provide a clear lense in which I can view the importance of my purpose for this lifetime’s mission. Focusing on my spiritual ascension helps me to understand the many changes I’m going through and the impending arrival of new emotional experiences. The healing that I have done over the past ten years has birthed this gift.

In the final months of 2021, my spirit team began to prepare me for a new love interest and thus started the whisperings of intuitive information about this new person. I believe we all view life through different lenses, depending upon our view of self. The realization that I deserve to be loved the same way that I express love has transformed my way of thinking about my own worth. Years of viewing life through the lense of trauma, pain and suffering definitely created  dysfunction in the way I felt about myself and critically altered my self esteem. After ending and healing from my last intimate relationship, I now know I’m about to attract an energetic match for my heart. This man will view the world as I do, heart centered, open and living life from a place of truth and acceptance. His emotional intelligence is very high, he is well grounded and completely balanced.

When I tap into my intuitive guidance, I see us enjoying dinner by candlelight, laughing while listening to music, hiking the mountains that surround us, camping in the desert and simply enjoying one another’s company. He brings me flowers “just because” and we have long, deep conversations about God and Spirit. I can’t make out his face or features,  only seeing him as a shadow either next to or across from me. Spirit is keeping our meeting a complete surprise. Over this month I have been invited to let go and surrender to Divine timing by practicing patience, trust and faith. The poems in this post are all centered around this learning, growing and rising.

My dear readers, we are ALL deserving of love and kindness. Right now in our world, there is a huge shift going on. I invite you to clean your lense by investigating your own experiences and trusting the adventures your heart has traveled through. Believe in miracles because they are real and occur around us all the time. Believe that you are ready for a more Divine emotional experience and a higher love. I’ve lived here in the Salt Lake valley for almost ten months now surrounded by these magnificent mountains that absorb energy and are very grounding for me. The east coast has such a frenetic pace and energy that I do not miss at all. Here, it’s a lot quieter, allowing me to feel more of the oneness vibration, connectedness and threads. I see more and more synchronistic signs and omens. My intuitive feelings have heightened tremendously since last September. The instinctual dance of human experience paired with all that is alive in creation continues to fascinate me and raise the volume of communication. Every song is now much louder than ever before. I find that I’m feeling into a million new truths of awareness and love for absolutely everything without having to understand it. Just allowing all as it. As it has always been and will always be. Life on life’s terms. We all come here with a story to tell, a song to sing, a lesson to learn. Observing it all helps me to pay attention and practice mindfulness which fuels my curiosity, helping me to see the immensely beautiful world that surrounds me.

The heart always knows best. May this post invite you to drop into its intuitive guidance, leaving the mental chatter of mind’s stories behind. At least lower the volume of the conditioned ones it loves to rattle on about. Follow your heart and awaken to soul!

“Always remember”
“Beyond”

If you’re interested in a long distance shamanic healing session via phone, tarot card reading, my recorded meditations and other ritualistic services I provide or to purchase any of my 6 books of poetry please click the link below. See the Services tab in the menu on this website.
For a personalized autographed copy of any of my books, please send me an email.
Maria@emotionalmusings.com
https://linktr.ee/Emotionalmusings

Healing, relationships, Spirituality

My Soul’s Dance, Accepting the shadows while embracing the Light: poems about death & rebirth

My dear readers I’m absolutely thrilled to announce my largest collection of poetry has been published! I’ve been writing the poems for “My Soul’s Dance, Accepting the shadows while embracing the Light: poems about death and rebirth” for over a year now. The transformations I have experienced over this time can be felt throughout the flow of each expression and on every page. This book is truly a labor of love, which is the main ingredient in all of my writing. The path away from what no longer was serving my soul meant the end of long term relationships, including the one with my only living parent. Loving myself and allowing myself to grow, to continue “Triumphing over Trauma” takes an introspective awareness when it comes to all I choose to engage with in my life. I lead with my authentic voice and my heart first, taking care of my energy always. Learning patience and having forgiveness with myself and others are also topics I stayed heart centered and focused on throughout this past year. In times of doubt, asking myself the question “what would love choose next” and my response would become clear. I feel a tremendous peace, a settling within my being, now that this book is complete.

I couldn’t of imagined how much my life would change from the time I wrote the first poem up through the last in this book! At times, I still can’t wrap my head and heart around it all. Very little remains the same about me from the beginning of this book. My heart is fuller, my mind is more open and my soul is deeper. How I view the world and my place in it has taken on a much more profound meaning. I’m an observer as a writer, choosing to share my life force and light energy with all I meet as a catalyst who intends to influence others by sparking their remembrance of the Light within themselves. That is the part we all play for one another my dears.

This is the introduction to the book along with a few poems and videos I recorded for my new TikTok page, Emotional Musings. I’d love to hear your feedback my dear readers in the comments. Please reach out to me personally for an autographed copy of my book and I will be happy to send one your way!

My Soul’s Dance is my sixth and largest collection of poetry highlighting my first year as a practicing shaman. Writing is the art of my soul’s expression and how I process life as an intuitive empath, psychic medium and channel. I understand the world through sound and movement which transforms into the words of my poetry. In June of 2019 I experienced a powerful and life altering spiritual awakening. I am compelled by my soul, to learn the lessons I am here to learn. These poems are a reflection of the death and rebirth cycle as I embrace my shadow pieces, loving them into the Light. I believe we are all infinite and eternal beings of Light, here to raise the vibration of Earth. I am extremely dedicated in doing my part to help heal humanity one heart at a time through poetry and shamanic healing. Many of these poems are dedicated to a man I was in an eight year relationship with and had to finally leave as I continued to awaken and embrace my own journey. I’ve learned that not all relationships along the awakened path are meant to endure.

I believe love is the power that will heal us all. My life serves as a testimony of strength and resiliency, healing from addiction, an eating disorder, physical, emotional and sexual trauma. Writing is how I process this vast, vivid and beautiful world we live in as the gift it truly is!

I live a full spectrum and awakened life. Moving with grace through this three dimensional experience stepping intentionally, filled with kindness, compassion, empathy and love for all living creatures. May these poems become the music to your own soul’s dance as we hum together and explore this collective experience called life. The movie we are all connected to, at differing speeds while playing different roles. We are all connected by our Light and by love!

“The pain of letting go”
“Time’s up”
“No fear”
“Independence cry”
“Forever”

If you’re interested in a long distance shamanic healing session via phone, tarot card reading, my recorded meditations and other ritualistic services I provide or to purchase any of my 5 books of poetry please click the link below. See the Services tab in the menu on this website.
For a personalized autographed copy of any of my books, please send me an email.
Maria@emotionalmusings.com
https://linktr.ee/Emotionalmusings

In light and in shadow, always with love. Namaste.

Spirituality

Setting my sights West

Since returning from Idaho less than one week ago, I can’t stress enough to you my dear readers how monumental a shift I feel now that I’ve  officially been anointed a shaman! It’s quite disorienting mostly and I find myself just wanting to be in solitude and in nature. The energy where I live is toxic and not a vibrational match therefore, I find myself very distracted by thoughts and feelings I know aren’t mine. Shout out to the other empaths and psychics out there because you all know what I mean.

My partner and I have plans to move soon yet in the meantime my patience in wearing thin. Today I’m experiencing a lot of the pain of being human my dears. I’ve been patiently awaiting my partner’s arrival since May. I know why we needed to be separated during my apprenticeship and now that it’s over, time is standing still! I know I’m divinely protected and that this chapter here where I live is ending soon. Today however, I’m just plain over it🤪

I rallied and had a good talking with myself. I hopped on my bike and took the longer, more scenic route to the beach. After I arrived I felt 100% better, much more present and focused. I want to share with you some of my latest poems. This reintegration process is a challenge I wasn’t expecting. I understand all I can control is my reaction to my current situation. I must admit I often find myself daydreaming about how wonderful it was to be in Idaho, with a woman who is my soul family and who understands me more than any other human being ever. Plus, the energy there was so chill. I’ve always felt as though South Florida has been my 2nd home after New Jersey. Now I want to experience life on the west coast. I’m over the fast paced, in your face vibe that is prevalent here. I believe my time on this coast is up!

I’m so blessed to find myself in a place where I’m not tied to anything so that making my next move feels exciting. The opposite of how many of my moves have felt in the last ten years. This one is 100% my choice, not a “have to” but a “want to”. I’ve had so many loving and supportive people around me that have graciously taken me in while I healed all areas of my life over the past 9 years. Financially I haven’t been ready to be on my own again since the divorce was finalized in 2012. It’s been a long 8 years of living with others, out of suitcases and boxes. I’m ready to claim my own life again and this is a feeling and a opportunity I haven’t had for quite some time.

In the past few days, I took full advantage of the glorious sunshine and low humidity. Here are the poems I wrote, based in observation of both my surroundings and my internal story. As always my dear readers, so much love💚🌱

Feel free to reach out to me via this link to book a healing session, request a tarot card reading or purchase any of my 3 books of poetry😊

https://linktr.ee/Ladysag77

Written 1 year ago, now finally realized
Backdrop picture by me, the view over the lake
Seeing so many dragonflies still💜
Free spirit ✨
❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
Spirituality

Love is a choice

Lately I’ve had a lot of time to think and be with myself. I started reading a book that looks at how we define love in our culture and how we are living in a largely loveless society. Whether you were raised in a functional or dysfunctional home, with one or both parents, not dependent upon financial standing, race or religion so many of us question what the true meaning of love is and many of us have never experienced it. We have a better understanding of care and affection but love takes a different level of unconditional commitment. A kind of “no matter what” place of focus. My dears, we are definitely in search of it. I like the definition that is presented by M. Scott Peck in his classic book “The Road Less Traveled” in it he clearly defines love as “ the will to extend one’s self for the purpose of nurturing one’s own or another’s spiritual growth.” To go on he says, “Love is as love does. Love is an act of will-namely, both an intention and an action. Will implies choice. We do not have to love. We choose to love.” “I believe in order “to love someone completely, openly and honestly while expressing care, affection, responsibility, respect, commitment and trust” we must truly be ready to willing to openly focus on each of these values with our whole heart. For me love is not a noun but a verb.

I have said it before and I’ll say it again, love is my lane. For me, giving and sharing the love that’s in my heart is akin to The Golden Rule. I have raised my boys by reminding them frequently that they may not like other people but you must always love others. Loving others is something that comes natural for me and the more I look around the more I believe love is needed in all of our interactions with one another for than ever! The pandemic and current long overdue social uprising is begging of us to love one another my dears. Like one of my favorite bands sang, “All you need is love”. Yes, we sure do❤

I was listening to another Beatles song today off “Rubber Soul” on my bike ride. “The Word” really made me think about love in a way that I hadn’t before. Here are the lyrics:

The Word

The Beatles

Say the word and you’ll be free
Say the word and be like me
Say the word I’m thinking of
Have you heard the word is love?

It’s so fine, it’s sunshine
It’s the word, love

In the beginning I misunderstood
But now I’ve got it, the word is good

Spread the word and you’ll be free
Spread the word and be like me
Spread the word I’m thinking of
Have you heard the word is love?

It’s so fine, it’s sunshine
It’s the word, love

Every where I go I hear it said
In the good and bad books that I have read

Say the word and you’ll be free
Say the word and be like me
Say the word I’m thinking of
Have you heard the word is love?

It’s so fine, it’s sunshine
It’s the word, love

Now that I know what I feel must be right
I’m here to show everybody the light

Give the word a chance to say
That the word is just the way
It’s the word I’m thinking of
And the only word is love

It’s so fine, it’s sunshine
It’s the word, love

Say the word love
Say the word love
Say the word love
Say the word love

What sparked all these thoughts about love? After taking part in the ‘Wounded Healer” interview last week and in the post before that one called, “Triumphing over Trauma” where I wrote about releasing shannon a deeper level, forgiving myself and it struck me. I’ve decided to destroy the mask I wore so often completely and forever, once and for all! You know the one we wear for society, for family gatherings at times, the one we put on so we feel “safe” and so others won’t judge us or ridicule us. Imagine if we all said NO to putting that damn mask on? Oh how much lighter I feel even writing that!

This past year I have been hyper focused on my healing from the inside out. I reclaimed practices, did a lot of deep inner soul work that required an extended amount of alone time and quiet contemplation, meditation and intentional detaching from things that were the root cause of my suffering. Today I woke up and decided in order to step forward and accept the Maria I am today, I must decide who I no longer am.

I have decided that in order to be vulnerable, honest and loving towards myself I have to keep strict boundaries with others. Listen closely to my intuition and protect my precious emotional energy at all costs. Say NO when I feel any of these things are being threatened and giving myself permission to allow for grace and gentleness from myself. For so many years I thought I had to kick me own ass in order to be successful and get things done. Now I know that I need to be still in order to hear what my next steps should be. I can move energy in and through my body in a much more gentle flowing way while pumping the brakes on the old balls to the wall mentality. All that did was exhaust and hurt me creating an inevitable burnout. Today, it’s clear, my choice is to love me!

By loving myself, I’m free to love others without resentment or expectations. Like the Beatles sing, “it’s so fine, like sunshine” and now I know that what I feel must be right, I’m here to show everybody the light.” The light that is within me. Once we can discover our light and allow it to shine from the inside out as God intended….OH BOY my dear readers, what a world we could all be enjoying together! I’m reminded of another song, “This little light of mine” that I’m sure most of you have either heard or sung growing up. I just love the playful energy that ignites within my soul and releases my true authentic spirit being reminded of this lesson😉

These three poems are focused on the ideas of love, gratitude and aliveness. I want to share them with you my dear readers. Allow these words to resonate deep within your own heart and then go out and love the heck out of everyone you meet!

“Let love shine in”
“Grateful aliveness”
“Growing pains”

Please check out my 3 books of poetry now available on Amazon at the links below 😊

Spirituality

Breath is life

I am so happy to say good bye to April and welcome in May😊 Last month was one of the hardest of my entire life. More details to come on that subject in future posts but for this post I would like to express my new found love for breathwork. You may be thinking my dear readers, what is breathwork? Here’s Google’s definition: Breathwork defines various breathing practices in which the conscious control of breathing is said to influence a person’s mental, emotional or physical state, with a claimed therapeutic effect. Last evening I participated in my second such course offered and facilitated by my dear friend Christina Tucciarone aka @comealivewithchrissymarie on Instagram.

Chrissy has an amazingly powerful presence as both a leader and a teacher. She and I have worked together a few times and I feel so blessed to call her my friend. I sincerely appreciate her devotion to what she teaches coupled with her insightful guidance during each session. Last night I really appreciated her steady reminders to push through the resistance that can be felt once the body is fully oxygenated. There were three rounds of active breathing for 7 minutes and then a minute each of holding the breath and releasing it at the bottom. During the first round I immediately felt pulled to the wounds from my inner child and an intense sense of fear and sadness. My entire body went completely numb. I knew instinctively that my body was attempting to dissociate. This coping mechanism is something I developed at a young age during the sexual abuse I endured. It served as a survival technique then and I must admit for most of my life over the past 35 years.

In the past year, since acknowledging and healing from this dark secret I have experienced a spiritual awakening that has transformed my life in such a way I view it has the Maria I was before June of 2019 and the Maria I am now. Going in and out of dissociative episodes when I found myself involved in intense emotional situations has been both a subconscious and conscious way for me to escape from reality. Over the years I had become very keenly aware of what was triggering me yet at the height of those experiences I was dumbfounded as to how to stop them from occurring. It felt humiliating afterwards when I would “wake up” and realize how much time I had lost. During the recent Divine Intervention session I had, Mr. Adifon confirmed that I regularly lose hours and still days of myself. Maria feeling Maria 100% of the time is very new still. Last night was a reminder of how going to that detached place no longer serves me.

I began to explore what little Maria was telling me. I listened and began a running dialogue in my mind with her, soothing her fears and reestablishing trust by vowing to not abandon her again. The human brain fascinates me. How such an intense level of fear and panic can create a whole new space for our psyche’s to travel to if just for a visit! My mind created this safe space, like a holding pattern for little Maria to still exist in yet not feel what was happening. Violation of a child is so seriously shameful.

However damaging that experience has been to my life I don’t regret it. I have learned so much about myself and the world around me from every single experience, everyday and in each moment over the past 42 years. Putting all judgements aside, good, bad, ugly and beautiful what I have learned is how vital all of it is to living a full life.

Here are some of the main things I have learned about myself over this past year……but most assuredly had them solidified last month. These were the messages I told little Maria I was proud of her for. Experiencing the pain of long held fear is absolutely terrifying when first felt yet in moment last night I knew I had to take control of my healing and be my own hero.

You are not afraid of change, you welcome it with an open mind and heart.

You have an intense love and trust for others, humanity fascinates you and you never meet a stranger.

Keep wearing your heart on your sleeve and remain proud of your free spiritedness.

You allow your big heart to lead in and through life’s ups and downs. Don’t ever change that Maria.

Empathy and intuition are your superpowers.

You my dear little Maria are extremely resilent.

Keep the people you love whether family or friends close to your heart creating friends for life!

It was an awesomely amazing hour. I cried a lot with becoming so flushed with emotion, sweat and gratitude seeped out of every pore in my body as we finished and wrapped up the session. I quickly composed myself and tucked myself under my trusty weighted blanket. Then I grabbed my journal to document the experience. I then took a separate sheet of paper out and wrote down the things I knew were time to release and let go of. My convictions growing deeper with every step towards the backyard, I read my own words aloud then lit the paper on fire. I closed the ritual with a personal prayer.

I wrote the poem below on Friday, before the breathwork course last evening. I’m so grateful for understanding and accessing my intuition and continuing to heal my inner child wounds. Life never ceases to surprise and amaze me. As always, with an open mind and heart I humbly bow my head and give thanks to God🙏

Intuition