Spirituality

Grace, humility and patience

I’d say these three values have been tested and strengthened the most over these past two and half months my dear readers. I’ve written here many times that I firmly believe that God brings us to everything He knows we can live through. Period. The less we resist the challenges life presents to us the easier it is to integrate these values into our character. Surrender. Release. Let go. This too has been a focused mantra of mine. Forgive me my dears, for I never want to portray any of this as being easy yet the concept is simple. With daily intentions and practice, we all have the ability to manifest a life beyond our wildest dreams! I am living proof of that my dear readers.

I have been thoroughly enjoying this holiday (in the U.S. we are celebrating Memorial Day) and because it’s been raining off and on ALL weekend, I have spent my time bingeing some Netflix documentaries and mini-series. The one that really grabbed my heart is called, “Unorthodox” about a young women’s life as she grows up in the Hasidic community and ultimately discovers that their world is not for her as she leaves to discover her own true path. The parallels I drew to my own life, healing and self discovery were quite evident in each of the four parts of this series. The main character, Esty, definitely had to learn to show herself some grace while being patient enough with herself to discover her place in this world. I believe the humility she already possesses as a young women in her ultra Orthodox Jewish faith helped her a lot as she forges through the many obstacles of leaving the only place she has ever lived and travels to Berlin, Germany. This is a true story written by a woman who actually did just that in hopes of uncovering her true authentic self. From the very beginning she even tells the man who is to become her husband by means of an arranged marriage that she isn’t like the other girls, she is different.

For those of you who have been reading my blog here, I too have expressed that I have always felt different from my peers. The black sheep of my family. Many of the scenes like the one of her bathing in the kosher bath as a way of purifying her body before her marriage resonated deeply with me. Her attempts at being reborn through becoming sub servant to her new husband in order to birth his children and repopulate the world with more Jewish people in order to make up for the millions lost in Holocaust is both selfless and remarkedly relatable because I believe we all experience some level of dysfunction in our lives. It’s meant to serve a purpose I believe in deciding what we ourselves believe in and are committed to carrying on with or what we decide isn’t part of our belief system and should be left aside. I don’t mean any disrespect to this community, that isn’t my intention with this post. My heart in many ways related to and broke for Esty because she was forced into many situations that were not her own choice. God has given all us free will and we come into this world as sovereign beings yet because of societal conditioning are thrust into certain circumstances and situations not of our own choosing. There in lies the dysfunction.

Coming to terms with own beliefs and forging a life we can truly be ourselves in is crucial to happiness. I myself have lived most of my adult life in an inauthentic way. Doing things to make others happy in hopes of gaining acceptance and love no matter if I was hurting myself in the process. After Esty makes friends with a group of musicians and is finally feeling accepted, one of them tells her some truths that were both necessary yet hard for her to swallow. Again, such is life. Are you my dear readers telling people things just to appease them, be accepted or make them feel happy yet not exposing them to the real truth of a situation in order to spare their feelings? Wow. That one hit close to home. I have often been the bearer of bad news so to speak because I am honest to a fault at times and don’t always sugarcoat my words. I have also been on the receiving end of such harshness and now reflecting back upon those situations, I’m thankful for them. Definitely a shift to how I viewed those situations at the time but isn’t that also another beautiful part of life? The mystery and discovery of what certain things are meant to teach us over our time here on Earth. Our opinions and judgements, perspectives and perceptions can completely shift. I believe just as life itself is, all things are relative and cyclical.

In that part of the story, even though she felt sad she ended up changing her entire approach for her audition in Hope’s of obtaining a scholarship she was yearning to get to a prestigious music academy. That is the very essence of all of life’s choices my dear readers. We can learn from these setbacks, shift and go in a conpletely different direction or we can take on a victim mentality and allow whatever hardship to destroy us, quit which in the long run turns into a resentment. Allowing others to cast judgements that we then use to disempower ourselves is a hard reality to face down the road. Believe me, I have lived through many situations and circumstances that I don’t regret now but at the time wished I had handled differently.

Everything that has happened thus far is truly a blessing and being able to admit that fully is real growth. By living with a false sense of reality, we only hurt ourselves. Up until this part in the story, Esty has faced so much rejection. Mostly within herself yet she keeps courageously plugging along trying to make her dreams come true. When her hopes seem lost, she calls her Grandma, her bubby and the woman who raised her and because the fear of being cast out by the community is too great, her bubby hangs up the phone on her. Again, Esty must decide if that setback will crush her and force her back to the only home she has ever known. Ultimately we are shown that she has the bravery it takes to keep going despite it all. Even when all the chips are down, she finds the strength to keep believing in herself. She wants a better future for herself and her unborn child. That part really struck a chord with me as a mother and somebody that has felt like a failure for so long.

This year has been one of complete transformation and rebirth for me on all levels. As a mother, partner, daughter, sister, friend and most importantly as a woman. Rediscovering myself and remembering what my purpose here in life is has been the most beautiful, painful, tedious and challenging experience of my life thus far. I’m grateful to have discovered what I call my soul language and my true authentic voice. I wrote this poem as a way of expressing that.

I have also started my apprenticeship to become a shamanic healer and in doing so I had some “homework” to commit to doing. I did a lot of sitting with myself, talking openly to God and spirit. Communicating with the spirit animals that resonate with me, learning about tree spirits…..stuff like that. I know many of you probably think as my partner does that that’s totally weird and a foreign feeling activity for you personally. It’s all part of my own journey however and I fully embrace it! God has brought me here to a place of learning more about why I have these extra sensory perceptions and gifts. My path is truly my own and in discovering more about myself I have been given this message. The following poem sums everything up quite well. This is where I find myself and I am eternally grateful to be awake, alive and present for the present that God has given me! Peace, love and light my dear readers….love yourself and one another.

Please check out my 2 books of poetry available now on Amazon at the links below.

Spirituality

Settling in

Ah, my dear readers my heart is at peace. Moving back here to Florida allows my spirit such freedom. The energy here is 100% delightful. Being a fiery super Sagittarius, I need to live by the water. Living at my parent’s house temporarily affords me the luxury of living on the lake where there is always a calming breeze. It fills my lungs with the sweet smell of the different flowers in the garden. There are so many different birds that swim here in and hang out around the lake. I feel my senses are delighted at all times!

Right now I’m sitting on the patio that is enclosed to keep the bugs out. I have a front row seat to Mother Nature’s glorious landscape and her living creatures that are native to this part of Florida. I believe I was a bird in one of my past lives because I have always been so captivated by them and lately I can sit and watch them for hours. Building their nests, cleaning their feathers and swimming. I have always enjoyed watching animals in nature. I believe one can learn a lot about themselves from watching other living creatures in their habitat.

The best part about this transition for me is the slowed down pace. Since this global pandemic began, that has been something I view as a blessing. First and foremost, I am grateful for my own good health despite the many people who are sick and suffering. Yes, many places are shut down. Yes, I can’t go to the beach right now or to the movies. Those are two of my favorite things to do with my Mom when I’m in Florida. I choose to see what I can control and that is more internal work on myself. Next week I will begin an apprenticeship to become a Shamanic healer and energy practioner. I am so excited to be following my soul’s purpose and learning how to heal others on an energetic level. For many years I contemplated becoming a nurse yet our Western culture’s view of medicine doesn’t suit my beliefs at all.

This profession aligns much more with my values and desire to care for others in a spiritual way. I have been caring for and working with people all of my life in some capacity. As an intuitive empath and woman with extra sensory perceptions, I have always been extremely fascinated by the human condition and how to best be of service to others around me. When I began this blog and published my first book of poetry, my mission was to shed light upon living with mental health issues, emotional and physical trauma and how to survive it all while empowering and healing oneself. Today, I view life as a series of learning lessons. Everything serves a purpose and through meditation I have been able to shift my perspective in order to better understand the meaning of life.

I have written before about how many years I spent paralyzed by fear and living my life as a victim of the circumstances I found myself in. Since June of 2019, having experienced two spiritual awakenings, I see everything differently. I believe we are here to love one another. Everyday and in all situations I try to ask myself the following questions before making a decision:

“What would be the next loving action”

“What would serve me and the people in my life in the best ways?”

“How would I like to be treated?”

My dear ones, God created us in his image of pure unconditional love. Over the centuries, I believe humanity has found itself so far off course and has begun to turn away from our original purposes. We are all intricately interconnected. Meaning what happens to one of us affects all of us. After experiencing such darkness, anxiety and fear throughout so much of my life, all I want to do now is show my love and gratitude for God by loving each person I encounter. Releasing judgments and opinions and living life by the motto of “be the change you wish to see in the world.” I’m by no means perfect nor do I attempt to live my life any longer with unrealistic expectations of perfection. I do however want to enjoy and celebrate life after overcoming so much that didn’t serve me or held me back and away from the light and love of God.

Getting to live my life with my son by my side makes my heart sing! I find myself crying tears of gratitude and joy each morning and every night while I pray, thanking God for our long awaited reunion. Everything is provided and happens in His Divine time. All I have to do is trust that when the time is right, all I need will be provided for. My son deserves to be with a mother that can guide and teach him about life. I had to learn a lot about myself and get to a place where I was ready to do that. It has taken ten long years.

Yesterday was the first Mother’s Day we have spent together in eight years! Waking up to see his beautiful face, spend time with him and share a meal is the best gift this mother could ever ask for. I intend to enjoy each and every second with him because tomorrow isn’t guaranteed and life is precious!

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Please check out my two books of poetry, both available on Amazon!

Spirituality

Breath is life

I am so happy to say good bye to April and welcome in May😊 Last month was one of the hardest of my entire life. More details to come on that subject in future posts but for this post I would like to express my new found love for breathwork. You may be thinking my dear readers, what is breathwork? Here’s Google’s definition: Breathwork defines various breathing practices in which the conscious control of breathing is said to influence a person’s mental, emotional or physical state, with a claimed therapeutic effect. Last evening I participated in my second such course offered and facilitated by my dear friend Christina Tucciarone aka @comealivewithchrissymarie on Instagram.

Chrissy has an amazingly powerful presence as both a leader and a teacher. She and I have worked together a few times and I feel so blessed to call her my friend. I sincerely appreciate her devotion to what she teaches coupled with her insightful guidance during each session. Last night I really appreciated her steady reminders to push through the resistance that can be felt once the body is fully oxygenated. There were three rounds of active breathing for 7 minutes and then a minute each of holding the breath and releasing it at the bottom. During the first round I immediately felt pulled to the wounds from my inner child and an intense sense of fear and sadness. My entire body went completely numb. I knew instinctively that my body was attempting to dissociate. This coping mechanism is something I developed at a young age during the sexual abuse I endured. It served as a survival technique then and I must admit for most of my life over the past 35 years.

In the past year, since acknowledging and healing from this dark secret I have experienced a spiritual awakening that has transformed my life in such a way I view it has the Maria I was before June of 2019 and the Maria I am now. Going in and out of dissociative episodes when I found myself involved in intense emotional situations has been both a subconscious and conscious way for me to escape from reality. Over the years I had become very keenly aware of what was triggering me yet at the height of those experiences I was dumbfounded as to how to stop them from occurring. It felt humiliating afterwards when I would “wake up” and realize how much time I had lost. During the recent Divine Intervention session I had, Mr. Adifon confirmed that I regularly lose hours and still days of myself. Maria feeling Maria 100% of the time is very new still. Last night was a reminder of how going to that detached place no longer serves me.

I began to explore what little Maria was telling me. I listened and began a running dialogue in my mind with her, soothing her fears and reestablishing trust by vowing to not abandon her again. The human brain fascinates me. How such an intense level of fear and panic can create a whole new space for our psyche’s to travel to if just for a visit! My mind created this safe space, like a holding pattern for little Maria to still exist in yet not feel what was happening. Violation of a child is so seriously shameful.

However damaging that experience has been to my life I don’t regret it. I have learned so much about myself and the world around me from every single experience, everyday and in each moment over the past 42 years. Putting all judgements aside, good, bad, ugly and beautiful what I have learned is how vital all of it is to living a full life.

Here are some of the main things I have learned about myself over this past year……but most assuredly had them solidified last month. These were the messages I told little Maria I was proud of her for. Experiencing the pain of long held fear is absolutely terrifying when first felt yet in moment last night I knew I had to take control of my healing and be my own hero.

You are not afraid of change, you welcome it with an open mind and heart.

You have an intense love and trust for others, humanity fascinates you and you never meet a stranger.

Keep wearing your heart on your sleeve and remain proud of your free spiritedness.

You allow your big heart to lead in and through life’s ups and downs. Don’t ever change that Maria.

Empathy and intuition are your superpowers.

You my dear little Maria are extremely resilent.

Keep the people you love whether family or friends close to your heart creating friends for life!

It was an awesomely amazing hour. I cried a lot with becoming so flushed with emotion, sweat and gratitude seeped out of every pore in my body as we finished and wrapped up the session. I quickly composed myself and tucked myself under my trusty weighted blanket. Then I grabbed my journal to document the experience. I then took a separate sheet of paper out and wrote down the things I knew were time to release and let go of. My convictions growing deeper with every step towards the backyard, I read my own words aloud then lit the paper on fire. I closed the ritual with a personal prayer.

I wrote the poem below on Friday, before the breathwork course last evening. I’m so grateful for understanding and accessing my intuition and continuing to heal my inner child wounds. Life never ceases to surprise and amaze me. As always, with an open mind and heart I humbly bow my head and give thanks to God🙏

Intuition

Spirituality

Held in God’s grace

Ever since my session with Joel Adifon, a Divine Interventionist who refers to himself as a Divine Catalyst and Supernatural Creative, I have felt quite the stirrings of a major shift going on inside me. Believing in the power of Gods, Saints, Annointed Ones, Masters and Angels to restructure my life, with an open mind and heart, I gave verbal permission to Mr. Adifon to work a miracle on me. It’s not something tangible I can even describe but what he told me during the session has been ringing through my mind since Friday.

He explained that I would feel very tired for the next two days and if I so chose I am welcome to call upon the spirits of those who stepped forth. First he asked me if I had a family member I was close to that passed over and immediately I knew my Nana was with us. I could feel her 20 minutes before the session even started! I sat in the backyard and raised my hands to the sky shaking, quivering with energy as I knew Nana would be there, as she always is, to support me and hold me in grace. I sobbed uncontrollably, in a completely non judgemental way. That has been happening ever since actually. All of a sudden throughout the day I fall to my knees in gratitude and wonder, sobbing while thanking God for his mercy and grace. For bringing me this far, through all of the trials an tribulations that have made up the fabric of my life. In awe is a good expression of how absolutely beautiful this experience is for me my dear readers!!

He echoed a lot of information that I already had heard through previous energy clearing sessions yet the work he does is beyond space and time. There are so many levels to our vast Universe, I am still new to understanding it all. I’ve written before about my spiritual awakening 10 months ago and since then I have definitely achieved a higher state of consciousness. It’s remarkable the beauty and synchronicities I experience on a daily basis.

Even as I sit here writing about this, I am taken aback at how my long held need to explain and understand things in the spiritual realm has shifted. I am surrendering the need to do so. I simply surrender. I simply know. Letting go and letting God has taken on a whole new meaning at my core where we are all held in love.

Besides my Nana stepping forward to work their magic, Archangel Raphel, saint of healing was present. I have had whispers of his presence around me for months now through the visions I experience. Some Tibetan monks also joined us as well as a saint I feel has resonated within my being for many years. Growing up Catholic, I have always been mesmerized by St. Francis, patron saint of animals and the environment. I’m a huge animal lover and nature enthusiast, believing that I can and do communicate with them on an intimate level. Much like I will be learning to do soon in my apprenticeship to become an energy practitioner as a Shamanic healer.

A quote of St. Francis’s that I deeply resonate with is, “for it is in giving that we receive”. I am a big believer in these words, I receive so much joy in giving. For me, throughout my life I often times believed that I didn’t deserve to receive anything. That I wasn’t good enough. Being sexually abused will do that to a small child’s psyche. During the healing process over the past 10 years I have worked diligently to reframe these thoughts and beliefs. Suddenly I can feel everything just coming together in such a way that I know Universe has my back in all ways.

A big take away for me was his recognizing that I lose myself for hours even days at a time. I developed a knack for disassociating as a coping/survival mechanism early on during the years I was abused. I simply internalized the pain and detached from myself. I have made HUGE strides in piecing myself back together. In the past I could be stuck in a dissociative episode for a month or more. Hearing him acknowledge that I still have a tendency to do that and be reassured that he was stitching me back together gave me this overwhelming feeling of calm.

This morning and every morning since, before I sit in meditation, I speak with St. Raphel and ask for his continued healing presence in my life. Then I usually feel as though I’m being hugged and then I release by crying. Today this poem flowed out of me. I want all of you, my dear readers to know this. God’s grace is attainable when you simply ask for it. We are all His children, created from love and light. That is our one true calling, to live by loving each other as God intended us to. Amen, Amen, Amen😇🙏

“Being held in Grace”

If you want more information on working with Joel Adifon, please leave any questions in the comments below.

If you like my poetry you may go to the links below. I have two books of poetry available on Amazon. Your interest is greatly appreciated. Everyday I strive to live my motto, “Triumphing over Trauma”

https://www.amazon.com/Emotional-Musings-Maria-Pratico/dp/1798567504/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=%22emotional+musings%22&qid=1587010926&sr=8-1

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B087H7D1VS/ref=mp_s_a_1_3?dchild=1&keywords=Emotional+Musings&qid=1587663034&sr=8-3

Spirituality

My grateful heart

This post is bursting with love and gratitude for all of the wonderful things taking place in my life. My heart is so full and happy my dear readers and I just want to share this wonderful news with you all🥰

I finally got a new laptop, WooHoo, which is making writing so much easier and much less tedious. I had been using my midgrade Android cell phone with a stylus to tap out each post, one letter at a time. That’s how dedicated and determined I am to write. As you can imagine, typing on a laptop is a breeze in comparison! I have started to assemble the manuscript for the 2nd book of poetry I will soon be self publishing on Amazon. This is something I have been planning for months and I’m so excited to release it, I’m calling it, “My Soul’s Language”. Stay tuned for the official release information my dear readers.

In a few previous posts I shared that I have decided to learn to become a Shamanic healer under the tutelage of my dear friend, Reiki master and Shamanic healer Lindsey Luna aka @soul.healing.with.luna (her Instagram handle) and yesterday we made plans to officially begin my apprenticeship early next month! Lindsey has been so I instrumental in my healing process for the last 10 months and I consider her a soul sister, kindred spirit. Her magic has successfully retrieved my soul and aligned my chakras so that I can step into my power. Realizing my soul’s purpose is something I struggle to put into words that can express fully the immense feelings of love and gratitude that I feel. The entire experience has changed my life and to know that once I learn how to do this myself, I will have the opportunity to help heal others is so life affirming! The only words that keep running through my head, like on an electronic banner, are thank you God🙏

It’s no coincidence that I find myself being able to see my path through at this point in my life. We are all in the Great Awakening process and these seeds were planted months back. I can feel myself on the verge of something great, I am not sure what it is but I can feel it in my bones and believe that wonderful things are about to happen for me in my life. I have been patiently following the bread crumbs Universe and Divine spirit provide. I keep in close communication with God and I can feel the support, love and protection all around holding me up in grace. Again, thank you God for bringing me here to this understanding of myself and your mission for me.

Last week I listened to my dear friend Chrissy Marie’s podcast, “The Art of Aliveness” (on Spotify, see below for the link) and I shared with you dear readers what magic she is able to facilitate with her own energetic healing practices. She interviewed an incredibly intriguing gentleman named Joel Adofin who is considered a Divine Catalyst and Supernatural Creative. While listening to their chat I felt goose bumps, chills and heard myself saying YES, outloud because he was confirming everything I have been experiencing in my own life for the past 10 months! I knew immediately that I was to work with him so I reached out and booked a session for Friday. Here is a brief description of how the session will go:

This session gives us the chance to work with multiple aspects of the Divine – channeled messages & Divine Grace. I am able to deliver messages if they come through. There is space to ask for clarification and time for discussion at the end.

For the next two days, while quietly sitting in meditation, I will prepare the questions I have for Joel to help answer. I am confident that I will hear exactly what I need to because I know the Universe has my back and is preparing me for that something great I feel coming.

For so many years I have read about what hope and faith are but only now do I truly feel this way and can see how holding these two values so dearly has been working in my life. I have devouted myself to caring for my spirit and have strengthened my love for God and all of the blessings he makes available in my life. It brings me to tears of joy and love. I just now my head and whisper “Thank you God” and Namaste. This is my latest poem expressing my gratitude for it all. Nothing but peace, love and light my dear readers ✌❤🌠

Namaste

Please check out my 1st book of poetry entitled, “Emotional Musings” available now on Amazon The 2nd offering of poetry is now available entitled, “My Soul’s Language” also on Amazon.

Spirituality

Leaning into love

This post has been on my heart for some time now. All the pain and suffering I am watching out there is for a reason. God and the Universe have put us into a forced reset. We are being made to rebirth ourselves. We are being asked to look deep within, for humanity’s sake. The systems that we were living in were and are broken. How we treat our planet, each other and most especially ourselves. Where are our values and what’s our top priority? These two things have been misguided for sometime now. Time to start anew.

I know it’s incredibly frightening at times. So many of us are out of work, myself included. We’ve been pulled out of our “normal” day to day lives and made to stay home. Left to our own devices. At this point we are all in a grieving process for what once was. I believe that whatever God sends us through, especially on a global scale like this, is because we need to learn something and this pandemic is serving as God’s lesson of love.

We are created out of love, by love, with love about love and for love. Everything we are is love, our entire being sparked into creation from it. Life in the beginning is innocence. Learning from our loved ones how to be, think and act. Then the cruelty of the world gets ahold of us. Conditioning starts and programming begins forcing us to forget about the love. Parents and caregiver’s mean well but the time constraints of allowing for and explaining feelings to a young person gets less and less attention if at all. Carrying on with what society deems important, what success looks like all the while replacing love with stoicism, vanity, greed, capitalism etc. We learn to lose our origins of love while searching for acceptance, validation and worthiness.

I don’t claim to know when or how exactly all of this takes it’s turn but what I do know is that love and feelings…..specifically feelings become messy. We are asked time again to ignore them and “being strong” and told by our parents, “look what you made me do”. Our innocence is tarnished by others judgements and opinions. The choice becomes clear. Either conform or be cast out. I know many whom have chosen to conform. They have just as many problems as those of us who are cast out.

Me……I have always felt different. Weird. Not like the others. My senses operate on an extra sensory perception level. Fun fact and an important piece that will tie this part in later😉 Did you know that we don’t even have tools to fully measure the sights, sounds and colors of our Universe? We have only measured something like 4% of the electromagnetic field which our Universe is made up of. I state this because from a young age I felt, smelled, watched in awe and heard so many things I couldn’t fully process or explain. From a young age I felt misunderstood and on the outside looking in. I did my best to conform, learning from the ones around me how to behave and get by. My parents loved me and raised me the best way they knew how. They weren’t equipped to raise a child like me who was born with all her senses on high like somebody turned the dial to max during my conception. Like all of us growing up I did what I was told so I could be loved and accepted as one of them.

It’s taken me years and years of self introspection to know what makes me unique is my soul. Getting into touch with this inherently free part of myself is the best gift I could have ever given to myself. It’s taken this slowed down pace our world is in recently for me to truly embrace and understand these qualities about myself on an entirely new level. I love living out every bit of my quirky weirdness, walking through life leading with my big heart first and using the innate ability to understand our world on a deeper level that keeps me curious about others along my path. I have always been fascinated by the human condition and what makes us tick🤔

We are all in this thing called life together. Why not allow ourselves to love each other unconditionally? No matter what we look like, what gender we identify as, what our beliefs are, the balance in our bank accounts, one thread is constant and that is we all have struggles. That’s what this virus is teaching me as it affects anyone no matter of these aforementioned reasons. Some of us have learned to hide it better than others. I wonder, does that make them better than the ones that wear their hearts on their sleeve? As I see it, it’s our feelings that make us human and sets us apart from other animals. Our ability to express them. There is strength in crying and a hugely powerful releasing quality. Scientists even study different kinds of tears under microscopes to determine their chemicals. All play an important role. I’m reminded here of one of my favorite quotes by one of my favorite actors, Johnny Depp.

Wise words

By now my dear readers you should know that I consider myself in that latter group. I have always walked to the beat of my own drum. Since my senses are heightened putting me into the extra sensory perception category, there was always something that was too loud, too bright, smelled too strong, felt too deeply etc. I was often told to betray what I was picking up on because I was too much, at least that’s the message I received. My Mom has told me how she and my Dad knew I was different from birth because of how I reacted to the world in an extra sensitive way. I was born fully encased in the vernix, the doctors call it vernix caseosa.

In many spiritual circles it is seen as magic, only 1 in 80,000 births are babies born en caul birth which is also called a “veiled birth.” Most often occurring during a cesarean birth. My mother delivered me vaginally which is even more rare to witness. She likes to tell me how all the nurses were in awe of me and told her how immediately special I was because I was born in an unbroken sac of white jelly like substance.

I can’t tell you for sure whether or not being born this way has impacted my life today in scientific terms. All I know is what my Mom has told me and has continued to be in awe of regarding this fact of when I was born. My Mom is and has always been my biggest cheerleader. I love you dearly Mom❤

I have been receiving many messages, none of which are veiled about what this time is meant to teach us. That my dears is love. Lead with love first in all your interactions and you can never go wrong. In times of doubt, ask yourself, “what would love do next”. The poem I wrote below , “Rhythm,” is my ode to the people in this world who have felt just like me. The weirdos, the freaks, the misunderstood and the loners. The sensitive ones. We have experienced the dark side of humanity and therefore know how beautiful and awe inspiring the light is. This shift is going to make it possible, I can feel it. We can hold each others hands while we ALL dance in a circle around the light. I can feel it my dears, can you?

“Rhythm”

I have been pushing myself outside the box by attending poetry slams. This has been one of my goals in this new year and since I haven’t attended one for a few months, here’s a video of myself reciting “Rhythm”.

In my bathroom studio

Please check out my first book of poetry available now on Amazon entitled “Emotional Musings” and stay tuned for my 2nd book to be released soon entitled, “My Soul’s Language” by Maria Teresa Pratico 😊

Spirituality

Let’s dive into our soul

This post has been trying to manifest itself for sometime my dear readers. With this ever changing situation our entire world is in, coupled with the spiritual growth I myself have been experiencing, HOLY MOLY y’all!!!! The messages, downloads actually, come so intensely at times it overwhelms my entire system. This week as I sat in Mother Nature’s excellence, I was finally able to piece together all of what was being revealed to me. I’m so grateful to have been able to finally sit with it all to make sense out of it😊

It is said that we attract what we need in this life and I firmly agree. The relationships I cultivate are exactly what I need to learn and gain wisdom from. For a very long time I brought in others who were broken, narcissistic and displayed deep sociopathic behaviors. Yet after this summer’s breakthrough, I see everything from a new light. I thank our God and creator for that whole heartedly. The perspective of “victim and why me” is now thank God me, what is this meant to be teaching me? I feel like my soul is this giant sponge just soaking up the energy of others to be nurtured into a more acceptable and loveable Maria❤

We are all interconnected and only together do we rise. Plug yourself into a soul tribe, learn from others and in turn gain an inner wisdom that is your own soul’s language. My dear reader’s that is what this down time has taught me. Whenever I am feeling resistance to what, specifically my partner whom I have been forced to be with 24/7 in a very small space is saying (at times shouting at me) I can go outside and say ah-ha!!! The stubborn Itialian girl inside needed to hear that. I needed to see that side of my own ego thinking to be able to accept that there is always another way of looking at the world 🤗

I feel very blessed to have so much quiet time lately. Tuning into my own natural rhythm and parsing out just what I make of the world around me. Going deeper. That is always my destination. As my son Ty would say, wow Mom that’s deep. Yes my dear it is and it’s only there that the truth lies. Whether I’m bouncing off the walls exercising, tap dancing or sun bathing in my backyard…..the Universe is constantly sending me affirmations and synchronization of prior messages as if to say “keep going, you are on the right path my dear.” As a devoted student of this spiritual journey, I bow my head and oblige 🙌

The things that have brought this naturally high vibe, extroverted and upbeat woman an abundance of peace has been maintaining my routine. Like my partner Lincoln asked once, “does spirituality take a day off?” In response I shook my head casually and said “Nope baby.” Everyday I open my eyes and charge forward with a real conviction to meet my soul wherever I am at and in that moment. Here is a small list of what I do before I begin interacting with the world around me:

Reading affirmations

Open Mark Nepo’s “The Book of Awakening” to read that day’s passage

Putting the chakra balancing crystals upon my chakra points while I turn on the SoundHeal app, sitting quietly for 10-15 minutes in whichever frequency I feel suits me in that moment.

My holistic arsenal of essential oils and chakra balancing crystals

After that I grab my journal and pour out my thoughts without thinking, judging or stopping. I believe in free association writing in the morning so I can get in touch with whatever my soul is connecting with at that moment. My dear readers, I can’t express to you how much these practices have meant to me over the last 9 months and how much inner wisdom I have gained from allowing myself to go in whatever direction is necessary. Working up that spiritual muscle 💪is needed for when I am called into battle as the human vessel I embody in this life. It’s all gravy or a cherry on top, however one chooses to see it🍨

This morning I was served the first test of my patience as I awaited the test results from the Covid19 test I had administered to me on Tuesday. My brother in law drove my partner and I to a drive through testing facility in downtown Dallas where they stuck a q-tip up to my brain space quite literally to retrieve a sample of my mucus membranes. I was then told to wait 2-3 days for a phone call giving me the results. This morning at 8:22 AM I answered that call only to find out that the person who took down my information had made an error in documenting my address (yes, I know what you’re thinking dear readers, why wasn’t my driver’s license scanned digitally) Without being able to verify me properly, even by my driver’s license number (I offered it too) I would have to wait for a call back🙄

I’m not someone who accepts NO for an answer. So I went about calling any official number I could find, even finally speaking to a supervisor at the state of Texas board of health to not only tell them of my story but to ask how I retrieve the result. In the meantime, 5 plus hours of frustration ensued. My partner and I are quarantined in our small apartment with no hot water (that’s another story for another time) his mother and aunt who are elderly and immune deficient are alone in the main house without our help and his brother has been banished to a room in his house all because we don’t know for sure if  I have this dreaded virus 🤬

Houston we have a problem

One more avenue I exhausted was registering myself on the website of the lab who administered the test only to find out that there were no known lab results for me. As of 5:45 PM, the time I am writing this post, I still have no answers. At this point, can I trust the result to even be accurate?

I share all of this to express to you all that we truly have very little control over what happens in our world. Even when we follow the guidelines and do what we are instructed. The only real truth is what lies within our soul. There lies our true North star and whatever I find there is what God wants for me to know and understand. I trust in that. I am guided by love and driven by faith🙏

I will leave you with this my dear readers. After my morning of frustration and aggravation, I put on my favorite music and got my workout on!! Sweating out all the crap I can’t change or control. Dancing to my favorite tunes until I was thoroughly exhausted and expressed💃

Live your truth, express your soul because that’s all that matters 🙌❤

A great man who helped to shape the music industry in our world, Mr. Quincy Jones said this and I firmly agree…..”Not one drop of my self worth depends on your acceptance of me”