Spirituality

Let’s dive into our soul

This post has been trying to manifest itself for sometime my dear readers. With this ever changing situation our entire world is in, coupled with the spiritual growth I myself have been experiencing, HOLY MOLY y’all!!!! The messages, downloads actually, come so intensely at times it overwhelms my entire system. This week as I sat in Mother Nature’s excellence, I was finally able to piece together all of what was being revealed to me. I’m so grateful to have been able to finally sit with it all to make sense out of it😊

It is said that we attract what we need in this life and I firmly agree. The relationships I cultivate are exactly what I need to learn and gain wisdom from. For a very long time I brought in others who were broken, narcissistic and displayed deep sociopathic behaviors. Yet after this summer’s breakthrough, I see everything from a new light. I thank our God and creator for that whole heartedly. The perspective of “victim and why me” is now thank God me, what is this meant to be teaching me? I feel like my soul is this giant sponge just soaking up the energy of others to be nurtured into a more acceptable and loveable Maria❤

We are all interconnected and only together do we rise. Plug yourself into a soul tribe, learn from others and in turn gain an inner wisdom that is your own soul’s language. My dear reader’s that is what this down time has taught me. Whenever I am feeling resistance to what, specifically my partner whom I have been forced to be with 24/7 in a very small space is saying (at times shouting at me) I can go outside and say ah-ha!!! The stubborn Itialian girl inside needed to hear that. I needed to see that side of my own ego thinking to be able to accept that there is always another way of looking at the world 🤗

I feel very blessed to have so much quiet time lately. Tuning into my own natural rhythm and parsing out just what I make of the world around me. Going deeper. That is always my destination. As my son Ty would say, wow Mom that’s deep. Yes my dear it is and it’s only there that the truth lies. Whether I’m bouncing off the walls exercising, tap dancing or sun bathing in my backyard…..the Universe is constantly sending me affirmations and synchronization of prior messages as if to say “keep going, you are on the right path my dear.” As a devoted student of this spiritual journey, I bow my head and oblige 🙌

The things that have brought this naturally high vibe, extroverted and upbeat woman an abundance of peace has been maintaining my routine. Like my partner Lincoln asked once, “does spirituality take a day off?” In response I shook my head casually and said “Nope baby.” Everyday I open my eyes and charge forward with a real conviction to meet my soul wherever I am at and in that moment. Here is a small list of what I do before I begin interacting with the world around me:

Reading affirmations

Open Mark Nepo’s “The Book of Awakening” to read that day’s passage

Putting the chakra balancing crystals upon my chakra points while I turn on the SoundHeal app, sitting quietly for 10-15 minutes in whichever frequency I feel suits me in that moment.

My holistic arsenal of essential oils and chakra balancing crystals

After that I grab my journal and pour out my thoughts without thinking, judging or stopping. I believe in free association writing in the morning so I can get in touch with whatever my soul is connecting with at that moment. My dear readers, I can’t express to you how much these practices have meant to me over the last 9 months and how much inner wisdom I have gained from allowing myself to go in whatever direction is necessary. Working up that spiritual muscle 💪is needed for when I am called into battle as the human vessel I embody in this life. It’s all gravy or a cherry on top, however one chooses to see it🍨

This morning I was served the first test of my patience as I awaited the test results from the Covid19 test I had administered to me on Tuesday. My brother in law drove my partner and I to a drive through testing facility in downtown Dallas where they stuck a q-tip up to my brain space quite literally to retrieve a sample of my mucus membranes. I was then told to wait 2-3 days for a phone call giving me the results. This morning at 8:22 AM I answered that call only to find out that the person who took down my information had made an error in documenting my address (yes, I know what you’re thinking dear readers, why wasn’t my driver’s license scanned digitally) Without being able to verify me properly, even by my driver’s license number (I offered it too) I would have to wait for a call back🙄

I’m not someone who accepts NO for an answer. So I went about calling any official number I could find, even finally speaking to a supervisor at the state of Texas board of health to not only tell them of my story but to ask how I retrieve the result. In the meantime, 5 plus hours of frustration ensued. My partner and I are quarantined in our small apartment with no hot water (that’s another story for another time) his mother and aunt who are elderly and immune deficient are alone in the main house without our help and his brother has been banished to a room in his house all because we don’t know for sure if  I have this dreaded virus 🤬

Houston we have a problem

One more avenue I exhausted was registering myself on the website of the lab who administered the test only to find out that there were no known lab results for me. As of 5:45 PM, the time I am writing this post, I still have no answers. At this point, can I trust the result to even be accurate?

I share all of this to express to you all that we truly have very little control over what happens in our world. Even when we follow the guidelines and do what we are instructed. The only real truth is what lies within our soul. There lies our true North star and whatever I find there is what God wants for me to know and understand. I trust in that. I am guided by love and driven by faith🙏

I will leave you with this my dear readers. After my morning of frustration and aggravation, I put on my favorite music and got my workout on!! Sweating out all the crap I can’t change or control. Dancing to my favorite tunes until I was thoroughly exhausted and expressed💃

Live your truth, express your soul because that’s all that matters 🙌❤

A great man who helped to shape the music industry in our world, Mr. Quincy Jones said this and I firmly agree…..”Not one drop of my self worth depends on your acceptance of me”

Spirituality

Life in quarantine

Ah my dear readers, here we all are…..at home. My fiance and I are sharing space here in our small apartment which at times seems smaller than it really is if you know what I mean🤪 Thankfully the weather here in Dallas has been absolutely gorgeous, sunshine with crystal clear blue skies allowing me to spend a lot of time in my backyard by myself. Feeling one with nature as I sit in self reflection. Here is some of the beauty Mother nature has shared with me over the past 2 days….

It is said when you see a cardinal it is a sign from a deceased loved one…hello Nana🖐
Tree limbs that tell a story

Just last evening at dusk while I was gazing up at this tree in my neighbor’s backyard….I came up with this poem📝

Trees

I have been using my free time quite constructively, squeezing all of the creative juices I can muster into my passions. I made pasta primavera for lunch and then afterwards I felt inclined to lace up my tap dance shoes for a bit of toe tapping💃

I’ve told y’all before that I am a Jersey girl, half Italian, Puerto Rican and Venezuelan with a splash of Polish. During these uncertain times we must keep our spirits up and tap our toes to the rhythm of our soul….mine’s extra seasoned y’all💃🤗❤✌

This post focuses on the lighter side of this forced down time aka 24/7 with my partner. Honestly it hasn’t always been a ball of laughter and smiles. Tomorrow I plan on writing a more serious and insightful post that looks at how very challenging this time has been for my fiance and I. It’s been over eighteen months since we have had this much down time AND spent this much time with each other with no reprieve. As much as we love each other….oh boy have we both gotten in each other’s space in an annoying way 🙄 Lincoln holds the title of being the only man I have ever allowed get close enough to me to even urk my nerves. But that’s for tomorrow’s post my dear readers.

Give me some space baby 🤨

For tonight, let me leave you with this. This is what is printed across the shirt that I’m wearing in the tap dancing video:

GIVE LOVE ❤ SHARE LAUGHTER 🤣 GROW PLANTS 🌱 FIND PEACE ✌ CHASE DREAMS 🌠 SPREAD HOPE🙏

Spirituality

A little bit of sunshine

Hey y’all!! I returned back here to Texas from Florida late Sunday night. I gave myself permission to rest and do nothing yesterday which is a real challenge for me having the amount of energy I do 😜 The weather cooperated however and was quite dreary with rain, inviting me to lay under the covers, snuggle with my partner while we watched movies🎬 one of my favorite down time activities.

To do list

The clouds parted and the sun was shining bright today here my dear readers! YAY, I am a huge sun lover 😉 I must express how welcoming this felt here since Dallas has been under rain storms for over two weeks now 🌞 I made my daily morning shake using these supplements. Took my vitamins, put on my work out clothes and headed into my backyard😎

Plant based protein & maca powder
Supergreens for superior health

First I read my daily affirmations, repeating them once over with my eyes closed. Then I read a page under today’s date in Mark Nepo’s “Book of Awakening” which focused on growing even in darkness. Ah Mr. Nepo, how your words hit so close to home today. I would be lying if I said that the current state of our world hasn’t gotten me rattled and worried. As an intuitive empath, the energy swirling around me affects me differently throughout the day. I am doing my best, my damndest to allow my emotions to flow through without getting stuck on the fear or sadness too much. My anxiety is amped up however, I do have CPTSD and it feels more intense lately in a new way my dear readers.

I spent three hours out there in solitude and it felt wonderful❤ I balanced my chakras using my crystal set too. Putting all of my energy into keeping my thoughts light and positive. Here’s a little video I took afterwards featuring my latest mantra🧘‍♀️

As Above So Below

I am centered. I am balanced. I am encased in white light. I radiate love from the inside out. I am alright🥰

Until next time…..peace, love & light ✌❤🌠

Spirituality

Love marathon

Out for a run today by the beach and it dawned on me that this world right now needs a huge boost of love❤ Our current situation with this virus is calling for a marathon of energy not a spirit my friends. Sending love out to you all, stay safe🥰

My loving intentions
My wish for the world 🙏

If anybody would like to reblog this please do

A poem with this intention can really help others and our world needs all the love it can get right now! We can never have to much love!!

Spirituality

Thanks and grace

Since I have arrived her to stay with my parents and soak up this South Florida sunshine 🌞 my dear readers the only thought that keeps recycling through my mind is love. Our world is in panic and fear mode due to the outbreak of the Coronavirus so to transmute that and be the alchemist that I am, my only job right now is to radiate love from the inside out. Our thoughts create our reality and what you think you attract (Law of Attraction). What if we could infect one another with love?


Dad & I out for a walk
Mom & I by the closed beach
The beach is my happy place🌞

Even though the beach was closed we could still walk along the sidewalk for awhile. It’s important for both of my parents to keep moving their bodies and walking in the bright sunshine is great for everybody’s mind, body and spirit!

Love & Peace

I just adore having one on one time with my parents. As the middle child of 6, there was hardly ever any alone time for me. Last night was amazing as I shared my chakra balancing crystals and sound healing meditation with both my parents!! To be able to get to the point in my life where I see them for the humans they are, they have lived through so much at 75 (Mom) and 86(Dad). They deserve healing and peace now. My Dad has full blown Dementia and had a TBI a few years ago when he fell over the parking curb at church, cracking his skull open. He has also undergone open heart surgery. Over the summer he survived pneumonia and sepsis. My Mom calls him her miracle man💪

Dad’s new additions in healing

My Dad also doesn’t hear very well and reads lips a lot. He kept calling the meditation “medication” which is really what it is, for the soul. My Mom told me she could feel the healing powers give her tingling under her back and begin to swirl through her stomach which describes our sacral area. My Mom has a lot of unresolved trauma from her own childhood and first marriage. Our sacral is the center for our feelings. This morning when she woke up she kept telling me how much lighter she felt, especially in her stomach area! She asked me to get her her own set and download the app I use for the sound healing which utilizes Solfeggio tones. You may go back in my past posts to learn more about what sound healing is all about😉

I have thoroughly been enjoying the release of any time constraints! Time management can often be my nemesis my dear readers. Without those limits I feel free as a bird and today I was able to practice a lot of self care out on the patio which overlooks the lake. The energy I feel when I’m by the water is so invigorating and drove my passion for yoga today. It felt so peaceful, stable and reassuring.


Tree pose🧘‍♀️
My OM✌
Practicing balance
Snuggles with Dad🥰
My Nephew (18 in 10 days) & my niece (20)

We had a delightful and delicious family dinner with my sister and her children er young adults. I get such a kick outta them since now they both tower over me and I once held them right after they were born🥰 The two of them are so upbeat and funny which kept all of us laughing during our get together. My nephew Nick is a senior in high school and has had all of the memorable senior year festivities canceled yet is taking it all in stride. My niece and Goddaughter Gabriela will begin working from home next week. They both understand the circumstances we are under and they love to laugh and joke with all of us “old people”. My baby sister, their Mom just turned 40 in October making the two of us the youngest of my parents children 42 (me). We are reminded now just how “uncool” we are. My sister Gina and I love to break out our dance moves and remind them that we still got it💃

Nicholas and Gabriela

Our minds and energy are more powerful than you think. Allow the fear & panic to flow through you. Return to love. Practice self care and then check in on your loved ones. My only intention is to spread love and affirm peace. It is contagious and will become inspiration for all to do the same creating a giant ripple effect ❤ Be still even for 5 minutes everyday by asking God for grace and saying thank you for your blessings. Turn off the TV, especially the news my dear readers! Return to your ❤ which is where all of us started from anyways….love. Focus on it and envision your arms around the world. Our entire Universe needs a hug right now🥰 Imagine, like John Lennon sang about if all of us did that? BOOM…..this current situation with the Coronavirus is a forced reset of priorities. Look for the blessings in this time we are being given or as I see it gifted. They are abundant. While I was out by the lake this afternoon a few of my bird friends walked right up to me. Seeing the beauty and message in nature makes my heart happy. It is free and it is all around us. The sunshine here is awesome 🌞 plus this virus doesn’t like it. Try to get some fresh air and sunshine if you can. We will only get through this together, as a collective because we are all connected. In the meantime I love each and everyone of you🥰✌🌠

Spirituality

Florida day 1

My Mom and I sat by the pool this afternoon and took in the glorious sunshine here in South Florida. On this day 14 years ago, our beloved Nana passed over into the spirit world to become the ultimate guardian angel. She and I communicate often and I know she is in bliss now. Always such a generous and kind hearted woman, never met a stranger and loved life as she lived it to the fullest. I love her and miss her dearly. I’m so happy I get to spend some quality time with my Mom and Dad in beautiful sunny SoFlo 😎

My Mom is the best
Glorious sunshine 😎

It felt amazeballs to sit on the lounge chair next to the pool and bask in the sun’s energy and warmth. As I drifted off to sleep I kept telling myself, everything is as it should be, you are loved and you are blessed 🙏

Nana, my guardian angel

Tonight my Kom cooked cormbeef and cabbage with boiled potatoes and carrots in honor of our Nana. We toasted her as I played “Wind beneath my wings” my the insurmountable Bette Midler. We played thos song at her service and my Mom and I both got emotional. Nobody could ever compare to our Nana. My angel. My light. My guide🌠🌈🙌🙏✌❤

Spirituality

Let love shine

During these uncertain and rapidly changing times, it’s important to allow our feelings to flow as they will. It’s normal to feel the fear and panic that is swirling through the planetary energy because of the affects from the Coronavirus. However, it’s just as important to not get stuck in a negative downward spiral of anxiety and worry.

I speak from experience my dear readers because for the majority of my life I was frozen by fear, paralyzed by it actually. I found myself in these terribly painful dissociative episodes and debilitating panic attacks not to mention the routines I created to soothe my OCD. There was a period of time when my oldest son Ty was a baby that I didn’t even leave my house. My anxiety and overthinking ruled my days as I found myself repetitively washing not only my hands but my home and beyond. Those were dark days my friends and I’m grateful to be past them now!

Yesterday I woke up with a vision for a new painting. I have always enjoyed using paints but have mostly used oils. This past holiday season while scrolling mindlessly on Amazon, I discovered these fantastic watercolor pens. They are refillable too and make using this medium so easy with virtually no mess! Not that making a mess bothers me these days however clean up is a breeze with these pens. My creative juices flow quite quickly and at times my time management is lacking in between my daily chores, practices and work schedule. Sometimes I feel the urge to paint when time doesn’t always allow for it. Lately I feel there are just not enough hours in my day, I bet many of you can relate to that!

Love vibration in full color

My dear friends and the owners of the boutique I manage decided to close down for at least this week and had me shut down a lot earlier this past Saturday night. It’s out of our control my dear readers and we all must abide by what our governments are advising for our own safety and health. I am choosing to look on the bright side of this unexpected time off. I have many creative projects to explore and execute this week. My mother found very reasonable airfare to South Florida from Texas and I will be leaving for there tomorrow morning until Friday night.

I am really looking forward to spending quality time with both my parents because they are elderly and time is so precious. Our weather here is calling for rain all week and being out in the sunshine of Florida feels much more positive for my spirits! My parents live on a glorious lake with a wonderful nature path nearby within walking distance and I’m really looking forward to spending time in nature too. Getting to float in the ocean and in the pool is also top on my list. Creating these serene moments of calm and serenity allow me to take mental photographs in which I can then utilize for meditative imagery when I feel stress mounting. Being able to visualize an oasis in my mind has helped me tremendously during my healing journey and one of the best practices I was taught ten years ago when I began down the path to self.

I want to remind you my dear readers that our minds can create the best and worst scenarios for our reality. It is a choice which way one wants to travel through thought and feelings. By practicing yoga and meditation I have allowed for space to be able to observe these choices so that I can best choose how my day will unfold. I chose to follow my heart and listen closely to my intuition. Deciphering between ego stories and my soul’s voice is a gift I have worked really hard at obtaining and one that I don’t take for granted by impulsive actions. I enjoy where I am in life today, the inner peace I feel and the love I feel radiating from the inside out. I have served my time feeling depressed and anxious. Those dark days and years have led me here to become the master of my own emotions and realize how much I actually do control my own reality. I’m no longer a victim but the hero of my own life’s story. This is the epitome of my motto for living, “Triumphing over Trauma”. Walking out of the shadows and into the bright light🌠

Allowing love & light to shine from within

When we chose to radiate love towards ourselves, even through times of conflict, we provide healing for our soul. When we are radiating love towards others, we reciprocate the love and kindness that they give us in such an abundance that it helps in their own healing creating joy for both the other person and for ourselves. It’s a transmuting force of energy and my wish for our world right now. Sending you all love, light & peace ❤🌠✌