Consciousness, Healing, personal development, Spirituality

The Sound of Silence

It’s been a little over three months since I’ve written a blog post. The longest stretch of silence for this passionate writer who enjoys sharing her journey with all the world as a testimony of “Triumphing over Trauma”. Since July, I’ve been quietly tending to my own personal healing journey. Some people have swiftly left my life in order for me to move onto relationships that serve my highest alignment. Big changes include endings that were necessary yet bitterly difficult and led to rebirth. I’ve moved (again) twice actually, leaving Florida for good and finding myself settled back in the West, with my big sister and my brother-in-law outside Salt Lake City. I’ve stepped back into the world of working a job outside my home as a vitamin and herbal supplement expert in a local farmer’s market while still growing my healing business and writing many new poems to be included in my 6th book of poetry, “My Soul’s Dance, Accepting the shadows while embracing the Light: poems about death and rebirth”. The things I have felt, processed, experienced and healed required solitude, peace and the priceless sound of silence.

What does listening to the sound of silence mean? I found one writer’s definition on Google stating that “It helps us see the empty, selfless, uncertain, transient nature of all experience and patterns of consciousness. The sound of silence is also helpful in developing attention and continuity of mindfulness. When the mind becomes very calm and focused, the breath can grow quieter and quieter”. In my practices I have developed the ability to attune to my own heartbeat and feel into both the nothingness and all encompassing everythingness. The grand abyss of the unknown. There lies peace and love which brings a joyful curiosity to all of creation surrounding us. After such sessions in silence I can feel how intricate a role we are all invited to play by our interactions with one another. Leading with love or reactive to fear. These vibrations yield choices and play a major role in how we treat ourselves and one another.

Growing up in a chaotic and dysfunctional home, silence meant anger, sadness and an intensity of unease would set in as I awaited the shoe to drop. It felt like a bomb going off as the emotional roller coaster would begin and I, an unwilling passenger was forced upon it, never knowing when it would end or if I could ever get off. Over time I learned how to drown my sensitivities out and abandon my self care needs. It’s required years of introspection to understand how all of my past now serves me today. How to heal myself, take care of myself and create healthy boundaries with others. I use my sensitivities and sensibilities as superpowers to discern the energy all around me. It’s helped me tremendously decipher what’s mine, what’s not and how to transmute the fear I feel back into love for myself first and then others. Many of the life experiences these past thirty-five years could have turned me bitter, angry and resentful. Instead, I choose to allow them to shape and mold my heart into a more loving, kind and empathetically open person who sees the Light in others. Silence has taught me to be compassionate towards the struggles of my fellow sisters and brothers. Listening to my own heartbeat, I hear the rhythm that lies within us all. Beating steadily is a message that we all need love, forgiveness, understanding and acceptance. These are what I choose to shine onto others. It all starts from within. We teach others how to treat us by how we treat ourselves. Be your own hero, best friend and love the crap out of yourself my friends!!

Resurfacing now from the silence is poignant because October celebrates the milestone of my three year anniversary here on WordPress. In December I will be ringing in my 44th birthday and these are the 44 poems I’ve written since my vow of silence July 4th. I invite you to close your eyes after reading each one and allow whatever emotion is stirred in you to rise and be seen, accepted and loved. We heal together, as one. We rise together in love. Within every season is the cycle of death and rebirth. My dear ones, we are to embrace all the sensations and every feeling for they are the sacred messages life presents us so we can continue this ride through life, to heal with more wisdom and clarity. Change is constant and growth is guaranteed if one can be brave enough to fail and keep trying. Sure the road is bumpy at times, there are detours and new available routes will arise when we trust that where we are being led serves a higher purpose. I urge you dear ones, through these poems to witness each piece of your soul and dream. Life continues to amaze, inspire and teach me. May you see your path illuminate and direct you clearly forwards. In light and in shadow, always with love ❤ Namaste 🙏

If you’re interested in a long distance shamanic healing session via phone, tarot card reading, my recorded meditations and other ritualistic services I provide or to purchase any of my 5 books of poetry please click the link below or see the Services tab in the menu on this website.
For a personalized autographed copy of any of my books, please send me an email
Maria@emotionalmusings.com
https://linktr.ee/Emotionalmusings

Healing, Spirituality

Home is where the heart is

What does being home mean to you? Gaius Plinius Secundus, a Roman philosopher better known as Pliny the Elder (or just Pliny to his friends) said “Home is where the heart is.” Almost two thousand years later, who would have thought home is where the heart – and other organs – could also be monitored and managed. This phrase means that no matter who you are with or where you are in the world, your family and home holds the deepest affection and emotional pull. It is the place where you have a foundation of love, warmth, and happy memories. It might not always be the building itself, but being near your loved ones.

After my trip to Rhode Island, I have been processing a lot of what my life has been like since leaving a place I called home for thirteen years. I had many reasons to leave and I thought for so long that I couldn’t go back. After ten years of moving around constantly, healing in psychiatric hospitals (both inpatient and outpatient) and a stint in rehab which lead to spiritual experiences that sparked another Kundaluni awakening (the 1st one was in 2011) I know home is in my heart. My heart is front and center, open wide and I finally feel secure in expressing myself from this place no matter where I live. The phrase, “no matter where you go, there you are” suits me. You can’t ever escape your own truths, trust me my dear readers because I tried desperately to erase who I am.

Nowadays I embrace my both my strengths and weaknesses, weirdness and philosophical depths, extra sensory gifts and soul truth. We are upon the eve of a New Moon that begins at 7PM EST tomorrow May 11, 2021. The number eleven is significant because it’s double 1 which stands for new beginnings. The Divine number of this date is two which symbolizes balance and partnerships. The planetary alignment has Jupiter in the zodiac house of Pisces. The last time this occurred was in 2010-2011. The personal significance for me is that was the period of time when my first Kundalini awakening occured. This type of awakening is defined as a surge of Divine feminine energy that spirals through the chakra system causing such symptoms as waking up at random hours of the night, sweating, crying, or even literally feeling an intense rush of energy going up your spine. You feel a sudden need to make radical changes in your life.

For me, this lead to a series of severe mental breakdowns ending in a suicide attempt. All completely necessary and now ten years later I look at as a gift of desperation that propelled me along the journey to reclaim my soul. This time around I feel whole, finally having claimed my calling as a shaman. The sessions I have held lately bring me to my knees in awe of the immense power to heal both myself and others bestowed upon me by Spirit.

The poems I write are guided messages for either myself or clients, channeled from a wide array of Spirits. The movement I cultivate as my soul’s medicine aids my own healing and my intention for sharing it is to bring hope that can serve others and inspire change. Ten years ago I was drowning myself in alcohol, dissociative episodes, over exercise and work. Dancing to the piano version of “Chandelier” by Sia, is my crawl out of that darkness into the light. A reminder to always hold onto hope.

Never let go of hope my dear readers, do whatever you need to to keep this energy alive in your being

You know by now by reading my blog posts how much I love spending time out in nature. The beach is my happy place and where I go to gain serenity, clarity and inner peace. Tapping into the biological connection we share with the mighty ocean is how I reconnect to my own strength and power. How do you reconnect with yourself my dear readers?

South Inlet Park, Boca Raton FL

May this New Moon allow you to pick up from where you began back in 2010-2011, planting seeds for your security at home and healing your heart. We are coming out of hibernation mode, stretching our limbs and climbing into new skin with a fresh start. Springtime is in full bloom and is readily available in the heart by choosing to love yourself.. Forgiveness of the past and reclaiming what you know to be true in your heart. This is the continuous cycle of healing from the human condition. I originally wrote the poem “Transformation” on July 18, 2020. At that point I was just starting the apprenticeship hours of healing others through the art of shamanism. Exoanding now upon those intentions, with this New Moon I’m dreaming big, shooting for the stars and opening myself wide to the miracles the Universe provides us everyday upon waking us up with the Sun and tucking us into sleep by the Moon.

If you’re interested in a shamanic healing session, tarot card reading, my recorded meditations and other ritualistic services I provide or to purchase any of my 4 books of poetry please click the link below or click the Services tab in the menu on my website.
For a personalized autographed copy of any of my books, please send me an email and use my PayPal account for payment.
Maria@emotionalmusings.com
https://linktr.ee/Emotionalmusings
paypal.me/tinyd9

In light and in shadow, always with love. Namaste.

Healing, Spirituality

Many paths lead to healing: This is what mine looks and feels like

There are many paths one can take to improved wellness and inner growth. I have based this entire blog on my own experiences of feeling and healing. My dear soul sister and fellow blogger https://erikakind.me/ created and shared this picture of my mantra “Feeling is Healing”, which deeply touches my heart because I believe our own feelings are the medicine we need to grow and expand into the powerfully magical beings we all are! In this post I hope by seeing what my process is you feel whatever comes through as your own opportunity and invitation to healing.

Today I woke up to Sheryl Crow’s song lyrics to “Everyday is a Winding Road” running through my mind like one of those advertisement banners with the flashing lights.

“Everyday is a winding road
I get a little bit closer
Everyday is a faded sign
I get a little bit closer to feeling fine”

We are the medicine

Spring is rapidly approaching and with it an energy of rebirth. In order to be reborn, parts of us need to fall away and die, change marches on, as goes the healing process. I feel a big shift is about to unfold within my life that could potentially effect a relationship most precious and dear to me. Heavy energy stemming from this loss arose this week and I faced it with patience and grace. I turned on a song that always helps me to feel these deeper emotions. Afterwards, I allowed the tears to flow, the anger to emerge and finally I felt more space and freedom. My dear readers, I implore you to allow your humanness to feel whatever YOU need to heal without judgment. Sending love throughout your vessel.

“This Women’s Work” by Kate Bush
Allowing what I feel to flow through, without judgements. Only love ❤

As my world opens up wider, further feeling the heartbeat of the Universe and my place within it, so many feelings come pouring freely out of me. From the depths of my soul through the ink in my pen, I could fill an entire notebook with the messages my guides send!

I see you my sisters and brothers, I feel you and I love you ❤

Two weeks ago I was honored to be interviewed by a fellow female artist whom I met through Instagram for her podcast, “Middle Finger Happiness”. Sharon Lee Zapata and I share a lot of the same attitudes on creativity and making the most out of what life gives us. Most especially without judgements from others aka putting up our middle fingers and carrying on no matter what! Here’s the link to our episode that was co-hosted with another creative soul, Leo Phoenix. The three of us enjoyed a fun, high vibe and very spirited chat. Shout out to my fellow artists whose journey’s continue to express their gifts through all the creative outlets of art, music and dance! May we keep rising after we stumble and using our talents to share love with others.

Truth in seeing by creating more space for the juices of inspiration to flow

Every night the app I use to create my poems, Mirakee, offers a word prompt challenge. If my soul connects to it, I tap in and write. This week I channeled a lot of what I was feeling through these nightly writing opportunities.

The prompt was “Sun” and everyone loves the Summer Sun ☀️
The prompt was to describe what success and failure mean to me, here are my musings
The prompt was to start a journal entry using the word If

I believe this message was channeled through from my Dad. Since he has passed over, I have felt him anchoring me from the Spirit realm. He is always lifting me up to face whatever challenge I’m facing. I’m incredibly humbled and honored that Mirakee named it the “post of the day” today. I write often my dear ones how my soul’s purpose as a writer and healer is to be a conduit for Spirit, to help inspire others to live their truth. May these words touch your heart and awaken your soul to be who you came here to be! I see you, I feel you and I love you all. Thank you for bearing witness to my art and expressions which is my path to healing by following and connecting with me in the comments. If this resonates with you I invite you to leave me a comment or contact me through email.

Grateful ❤

If you’re interested in a shamanic healing session, tarot card reading, my recorded meditations or to purchase any of my 4 books of poetry please click the link below or click the Services tab in the menu.
For a personalized autographed copy please send me an email and use my PayPal account for payment. Maria@emotionalmusings.com
https://linktr.ee/Ladysag77
paypal.me/tinyd9
In light and in shadow, always with love. Namaste.

Healing, Mental health, Spirituality

The pursuit of happiness

There are so many analogies that come to mind when I think of the phrase, “the pursuit of happiness”. Our culture breeds this idea that it’s a thing to find that we somehow lost, an item to buy, a type of thing to possess that is outside of ourselves or that another person will be the magic ingredient to solve all of our worries and problems. I believe through the consumerism and entertainment culture we have screaming at us 24/7 that we’re programmed to believe we aren’t happy. What does it mean to be happy?

My dear readers, I believe happiness is 100% an inside job and the truth is that we aren’t going to feel perpetual happiness 100% of the time. Being human means that we have a wide array of feelings and emotions that alert us to what our body needs in each moment. Attending to each is sometimes a challenge, especially in our fast paced society yet taking the time to truly do so has amazing and priceless benefits.

We are coming up on a year since the beginning of the pandemic that changed our entire world. I’m incredibly grateful for the extended time and opportunity to work on myself and heal. Feeling is so very healing yet we must allow ourselves to truly feel all of it, the complete human experience doesn’t come with just the good vibes my dears. Since my Dad has passed and I have been separated from my partner, I am realizing more and more how precious we are to one another. My partner serves as the most clear of mirrors and our connection allows me to see myself fully. Lately, some hard truths rose to the surface that my ego needed to hear but didn’t enjoy hearing. I’ve changed every aspect of my life for the betterment of my own soul. Awesome for me yet he admitted to not knowing who I am anymore, that he needs to get to know and fall in love with me again. I must allow him time and space in which to do this. We are each others one true love and through acceptance of one another, I believe our love will get us through.

Life is like a freshly squeezed glass of orange juice with the juiciest bits all mixed in, not merely on top but sprinkled in throughout. We must dig deep at times to feel the most of what life is teaching us. Using the juice analogy, each container tells us to shake before we pour so we get the best of its offering into each glass. Life shakes us up repeatedly and at times it’s easy to feel all mixed up. The truth is happiness is always available should we choose to feel it. However it’s perfectly normal to not feel happy all the damn time!! Being…..just being, tapping into my skills of observation allows me to investigate all of my feelings through all of my senses. For a women who feels deeply and is acutely sensitive this can be extremely challenging. I sometimes wish I had an off switch and could just feel and process me, not everyone else around me. As an open psychic channel, my soul asked to be reincarnated this way yet it’s hard explaining this fact to others unless they have experience with it.

From the inception of this blog, Emotional Musings has served as a testimony to what life is like for me in recovery from life long dissociation and trauma. I’m an empath, an open psychic channel, a trauma survivor, a suicide survivor, a divorced mother diagnosed with CPTSD who searched for answers to find peace and healing to discover that all of my sensibilities allow me to follow my soul’s purpose and path to becoming a master shaman. God set me with all the sense settings on high and He gifted me with being able to write poems that can articulate the abundance of feelings I feel all the time.

These are my latest lessons in life that are expressed through poetry. This last full moon was a big one for me in terms of looking within the shadows to release what no longer was serving me. Healing hurts my dears and this past week I have felt every feeling and emotion there is. I’m exhausted, elated, sad, grateful and yes, happy. I’m happy to be alive and experience all of life in the skin I’m in! Tomorrow I am going to experience float therapy which I have read rave reviews about. I already know that this therapeutic experience will rejuvenate and refresh my spirit returning me to a place of balance and harmony.

Thank you so much @myjourney_sda for allowing me to share my testimony of survival to “Triumphing over Trauma”. We are all in this together, sharing our journey, challenges and gifts. We rise as one. Much love to you all ❤

Stay true to YOU
“Love is the Medicine”

In light and in shadow, always with love. If you’re interested in a shamanic healing session, tarot card reading, my recorded meditations or to purchase any of my 4 books of poetry please click the link below or click the Services tab in the menu.
For a personalized autographed copy please send me an email and use my PayPal account for payment. Maria@emotionalmusings.com
https://linktr.ee/Ladysag77
paypal.me/tinyd9

Consciousness, Healing, personal development, Spirituality

Embracing the Healing Field

My dear readers, I’m so pleased to announce that I’m now an official contributer for Healers magazine based here in Miami, Florida. My first article can be read here https://healersmagazine.com/blog/ entitled “Embracing the Healing Field” which is a review of the documentary on Amazon of the same name. I was so intrigued by the information in it about the Quantum field of energy healing because of the profound experience I have had with it, I felt compelled to write the review sprinkled with my own life’s healing experience. I invite you my dear readers to click the link and read it. Please let me know your thoughts by commenting here or sending me an email.

A dear sister friend of mine requested I record some more videos of myself reciting my poems. Here are the two latest ones I shared on my social media platforms. The first one is dedicated to my muse, my partner and my best friend. The second is about my continued transformation as I heal my soul and fulfill my purpose to assist others in their healing process as a shaman. Please see my newly added complete list of services in the menu tab of this blog. I’m honored to work with others who are curious about what a shamanic healing session can bring into one’s life, healing past trauma and elevating the soul. Thank you so much to https://missdorrina.com/ for your love and support in helping me tweak this blog. Technology is not something I enjoy but a necessary part of blogging. Your assistance is greatly appreciated and absolutely priceless!

“Two as One”
“Opening”

These past 19 months have truly been life altering as I release what no longer serves me, live intentionally from my heart without hiding and expand further into the creative being I am. I absolutely love to dance and feel it’s the most freeing experience I regularly practice. This is me. 100% soul powered!

“Adventure of a Lifetime” by Coldplay
“Can You Feel It” by Michael Jackson

Life is an adventure that I can feel everyday. You can too my dear readers, it’s all in how you choose to look at it. Lately I’ve felt another expansive period of alignment with the Light, Divine Source. This is a poem I wrote after a meditation session. We are birthing change my dear ones and what the unknown will bring is whatever your imagination can dream!

“Birthing change”

In light and in shadow, always with love. If you’re interested in a shamanic healing session, tarot card reading, my recorded meditations or to purchase any of my 4 books of poetry please click the link below or click the Services tab in the menu.
For a personalized autographed copy please send me an email and use my PayPal account for payment.
https://linktr.ee/Ladysag77
paypal.me/tinyd9