Healing, personal development, Spirituality

New Beginnings, My Dance with Spirit

The saying, “you never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have” is singing through my mind as I compose this post my dear readers. It’s been two weeks since I made the hardest choice in my life to end the relationship with a man I know is my true love and soul mate. The strength, power and sheer freedom I have experienced is more than I can accurately articulate into words! I’m dancing in the sunlight of my spirit which further awakens depths within my soul that are new and exciting! I’m unleashing myself into the fires of creativity with passion for whatever is to come. The energy I feel is electric and empowering as the love vibration rises to new heights!

April is here and with it comes a freshness that has me skipping along my path as it unfolds. Ideas are springing forth with music and color bursting into light as I express myself by writing, dancing and the ritualistic practices of the shaman warrior I am. I’m about to embark upon a one year sound therapy certification and I’m thrilled to learn more about the therapeutic healing that has changed so much for my sensitive being. I regularly use different sound frequencies when I meditate to heal, align and balance the seven main chakras in the body. I love to learn and welcome all opportunities to extend my knowledge in this area. I’m also taking part in a clinic for stand up paddle boarding at the local beach I frequently ride my bike to. I first tried the sport five years ago and fell in love with it. It aligns perfectly with my yoga and ballet practice plus the added enjoyment of being on the water.

God’s continuous love has me looking up with so much gratitude for this soul journey

I’ve started adhering to nudges from the Universe to unplug from technology more regularly. I’d much rather keep my face in nature’s beauty or in a book lately. Rereading some of my favorites from Maya Angelou and new books like “How To Do The Work” by Dr. Nicole La Pera aka “the holistic psychologist” on Instagram is about how to reconnect with your authentic self and heal as the powerfully magical beings we are. I’ve been following her and adding many of the techniques she shares on social media into my healing practices for two years now. Life continues to open up possibilities to me that I never thought possible to experience before and I am ready to live life as the gift it is! Living is an art and I am the painter of my own masterpiece. So are you my dear readers, be an original because our world needs you!

We are all more than “Smile and Be Pretty”
Da LA Soul’s “Me, Myself & I

Along with the new classes I’ll be taking, I booked a long anticipated trip up to Rhode Island to see my two boys. I haven’t been “home” (I resided there for 13 years) in almost 5 years and I am beyond excited to reconnect with my boys, dear friends and the place that holds many memories for me. Some of them are painful and traumatic yet I know I’m strong enough now to face them and take back the power I left in that place when I felt broken and empty of spirit. I moved away in 2013 to heal from a painful divorce that I initiated, a destructive pattern of abusing myself with drugs and alcohol and to create a fresh start in life. That’s when I moved here to my family’s second home in South Florida. A few months after moving here and one year after my divorce, I met my ex partner, through mutual friends. The past eight years has been a climb, back to sanity and wholeness. Honestly, the me I am now is the most alive and whole I have ever felt in all my life!

Becoming Me

I’m unafraid and finished with hiding who I really am. The confusion has vanished, an amnesia of sorts, as I awaken every day more excited than before for what the day holds. Remaining curious, inquisitive and open for the mysteries that await me. My creative passion drives me and when something comes to my mind, I do it! Like this video, I bust loose and shake off everything that doesn’t serve my highest good and healing.

“Bustin Loose”
Shake off what no longer serves my dear ones ❤
This book has been a part of my daily practice of reflection for years now
Standing I my power
Feeling everything
Hard truths
Soul Journey
Listen to your Soul Cry

Lastly my dear readers, I will leave you with a short video, a glimpse into the healing that I practice and share with my clients through crystals, the wisdom of tarot and the Light powered energy that is Divinely provided by Spirit.

Healing magic bathed in Full Moon brilliance

If you’re interested in a shamanic healing session, tarot card reading, my recorded meditations or to purchase any of my 4 books of poetry please click the link below or click the Services tab in the menu.
For a personalized autographed copy of any of my books, please send me an email and use my PayPal account for payment.
Maria@emotionalmusings.com
https://linktr.ee/Emotionalmusings
paypal.me/tinyd9

In light and in shadow, always with love. Namaste.

Grief and loss, Healing

In memoriam

Yesterday was a glorious day for my family and I as we bid our final farewell to my Dad. My Mom was especially happy to hold this memorial service in their Catholic church 45 years to the day they had their first date. I was extremely honored to be the representative from the family to give the eulogy which included the poem I wrote “Daddy” just hours before he passed on November 24, 2020. This was the closure we all needed and the homecoming my Dad deserved.

For you Dad
“Daddy”

We continued the celebration of my Dad’s life with an Italian fest fit for the king he is, a luncheon that was held at his favorite restaurant which included family and close friends, about twenty people. My older sister flew in from Utah and my oldest brother drove down from Orlando. It was especially great to all be together again since we have all been separated by the pandemic. We laughed and we shed tears. We all shared our favorite memories of my Dad. I was so comforted by my family yesterday and it felt so good to be with the people I love the most. My partner is here (FINALLY) and he was and is my rock, grounding me through the grieving process. I’m so grateful and blessed to have these people in my life when I need them the most. My gratitude includes my dear friends that are scattered across the country and in other places around the world who have sent condolences with love including so many of you my dear readers. From the bottom of my heart, your love means so much to me. Connection is a key in healing because we all experience loss. This is a time we need to lean on each other.

My sister Tami arranged these beautiful flowers

I took this video of myself dancing hours before my partner’s arrival. I absolutely adore Janis Joplin’s style and fiery vocals. My partner often remarks on how I remind him of her so I felt it fitting to dance in tribute to her and my love for all of humanity. I put a piece of my heart into every creative thing I do. If I don’t feel passionate about it, I simply don’t do it. Life is precious and I intend to make the most of my time here doing what I love to do most which is expressing the depths of my creative soul in light and love!

“Piece of My Heart”

In light and in shadow, always with love. If you’re interested in a shamanic healing session, tarot card reading, my recorded meditations or to purchase any of my 4 books of poetry please click the link below or click the Services tab in the menu.
For a personalized autographed copy please send me an email and use my PayPal account for payment. Maria@emotionalmusings.com
https://linktr.ee/Ladysag77
paypal.me/tinyd9

Grief and loss, Healing, Spirituality

The light of love shines like a mirror

Imagine your being as a mirror, what are you reflecting out into the world? Are you living authentically, heart centered and open or are you closed, in fear and driven by the chaos. Finding a balance in between the two is where peace lies. Living by my soul’s purpose shows me the ways in which I can adjust my mirror on a daily basis so that I can be the best me possible and shine my bright light of love, my mirror upon others.

Humans were built for community, we need one another to grow and learn from. Some lessons are more challenging than others. This week has been a particularly emotional one for me as the waves of grief wash over me, processing the loss of my Dad was my main focus again. We heal in cycles my dear ones, being forever brought back to the places we need to go deeper into acceptance of. It all serves and healing never ceases. While riding my bike back and forth to the beach twice this week, about thirty miles or so altogether, I found myself repeating this mantra:

“I acknowledge, I surrender, I release, I accept”

There are no mute or pause buttons that are helpful for processing deep emotions. The best choice is to practice what these words mean, to heed their lesson. Awareness is the name of the game. I am all of what I feel by accepting whatever is coming up, leaning into it and dancing with its message. The medicine I choose is always love. The person who is responsible for loving all of me, is me. I retreat to the beach and allow the healing light of the Sun to work his magic. I also brought along some tiger’s eye crystals that are great for helping to release fear and anxiety and aids in achieving harmony and balance within. It stimulates taking action, and helps you to make decisions with discernment and understanding, becoming unclouded by your emotions. Practicing patience by surrendering to and allowing whatever shows up to wash through until a clear decision is reached.

Love is the best medicine

The app I use to create my poems is called Mirakee. Every day they ask the members to participate in creating a poem from a word prompt. It’s a fun way of writing and I am usually surprised at what flows out. The word that prompted this poem was”to write a poem based on our zodiac sign”. This poem “Firefly” is a celebration of those like me who are born under the zodiac sign of Sagittarius. Here’s to the wild, adventurous and freedom loving fellow Sagittarians!

Sagittarius ♐

In times like this I find it’s important to be extra gentle with myself and I practice this by breathing consciously and scheduling time for extra meditation. This week I was guided to focus on my heart chakra a bit more. This is the area of our body where most of us neglect and is the root cause for conditions like heart disease to manifest. Slowing down and paying closer attention to our hearts, while quieting the mind is essential to our well-being my dear readers. I invite you to tap into your heart and heal whatever comes up. This is where our truth lies.

Love over fear, the two can not coexist

Finally, as the God centered being I am, I turn to His lessons of love for all of creation, unity, harmony and balance. His grace and mercy are readily available to each and every one of us, believers and non believers alike. When we can tap into a power greater than ourselves it’s amazing what we can find. Call it the Universe, Mother Nature or God (I see them all as one force) When I can become still within this vibration, the great I AM comes forth and heals my soul. It is within each of us, supporting us, existing in all of nature that surrounds us. This belief soothes me most of all. And so it is. Amen. Amen. Amen.

God’s love is the greatest of all
The Lord’s Prayer

In light and in shadow, always with love. If you’re interested in a shamanic healing session, tarot card reading, my recorded meditations or to purchase any of my 4 books of poetry please click the link below. For a personalized autographed copy please send me an email and use my PayPal account for payment.
https://linktr.ee/Ladysag77
paypal.me/tinyd9

Spirituality

Now on Emotional Musings

Grief and loss, Healing, Spirituality

The tao of my heart

Today marks three weeks since my Dad’s passing. This time in my life, remains as I described in my last post, strangely beautiful. We’re extremely connected yet I can’t help but feel a tremendous heaviness within my heart. I’ve accepted that it will remain there for some time to come.. It’s as though his passing has created a leak within my heart and as much I try to find my footing, my flow is off. Ah, patience you fickle concept you. Alas, I find myself sitting amongst many of us in the collective within the dark night of my soul period, otherwise known as shadow work. The Universe has presented me with a triple whammy of sorts to sit through.

My creativity and imagination are what I’m leaning into mostly right now. Truth be told, patience and I are not friends lately. Google defines the concept of patience as “being more than trust, and as a value that reflects the state of one’s body and mind. The term pariksaha is sometimes also translated as test or exam, in other contexts. Some of these concepts  have been carried into the spiritual understanding of yoga”.

I must admit I haven’t been on my yoga mat as much as I should and need to be lately. I’m being brought through old coping patterns and lots of nostalgia. I’m having that, “seeing my life flashing before my eyes” scenario play out minus the sense of impending doom. Most days I cry often allowing the flow of my tears to happen without lending judgement to them. Crying for crying’s sake.

Many questions relating to Taoism keep popping up in my mind. Taoism is the ancient Chinese philosophy  (also known as Daoism)  attributed to the teachings of Lao Tzu, a spirit I channel often.  It emphasizes doing what is natural and “going with the flow” in accordance with the Tao (or Dao), a cosmic force of energy which flows through all things that both binds and releases them. These ideas align with me as a shaman as I ponder what my place is within this world. This year has brought me to a depth of my soul, a dark abyss  that can best be described as the place where scuba divers get to, way down deep into the ocean where they experience neutral buoyancy. Their bodies merge as one with the deep waters, allowing them to be so deep & swim as freely as they want to. These freedoms within this depth has triggered yet another layer of fear to be peeled from my being. I find myself once again, surrendering to the unknown and allowing myself to fall apart.

Breakdowns lead to breakthroughs,  I admitted to my son the other day when he called to say hi and I spontaneously broke out in tears. I told him that God gives his toughest battles to the fiercest warriors. Witnessing my Mom’s broken heart, the pain from having COVID-19 herself and not being able to hug my siblings hurts. Period. My dear friend Sophia reminded me soon after my Dad passed that I don’t always have to be the strong one. Boy, these past three weeks have shown me that truth in the most profound of ways. Again, my dear readers I retreat to my words and my paints.

This past weekend was quite cathartic as I sat out on the patio, watching the rain and painting. These are my latest poems, all speak to the strong emotions that my heart is acknowledging and releasing. My only job is observing them and allowing them. Keeping my healer’s heart and soul in balance. One of my soul sister’s and I had a great chat on Saturday about the power of vulnerability as a healer. Honestly, I myself have more respect for those who can admit their struggles than the constant “love and light” crowd that tend to be found spiritually bypassing those of us who are doing the deep inner work that explores the pain. My heart is in pain yet I know it’s a temporary situation in order to strengthen me. To live life without my Dad. To face life’s challenges minus my life partner for the time being. To rely solely upon myself and know that I’m constantly supported by the Divine. To embrace being pure magic. To remember who I am as a child of God who graciously serves Him.

“Dark night of the soul”
Acknowledging and releasing
Peeling another layer of fear
Wiping the slate clean

On Sunday, the sun was shining brightly as I went out for a run. As I approached the nature preserve near the park I run in, I looked up to see my Dad’s spirit flying overhead as a short-tailed hawk. Moments later I looked down and right  there, in the middle of the sidewalk was a beautiful lapis lazuli stone! A reminder, a gift from Dad to always speak my truth and stand in my power. I use this stone regularly to balance my throat chakra and I just so happened to have transplanted mine that morning. Lapis luzli is a powerful stone that encourages self-awareness and taking charge of your own life. It helps us to express ourselves safely, empowering us without holding back, and brings the qualities of honesty, compassion, and integrity. Indeed Divinely timed, guided, protected and unconditionally loved.

Thanks Dad💙

A theme that has been present for me during this time is water. Ah, how water does elevate the pressure and the sheer weight of these feelings, assisting in the flow of them. I want to share with you dear ones this beautiful song. While you listen to it, visualize the power of the ocean washing away all your fears. Namaste.

In light and in shadow, always with love. If you’re interested in a shamanic healing session, tarot card reading, my recorded meditations or to purchase any of my 4 books of poetry please click the link below.
https://linktr.ee/Ladysag77