Healing, Mental health, Spirituality

The pursuit of happiness

There are so many analogies that come to mind when I think of the phrase, “the pursuit of happiness”. Our culture breeds this idea that it’s a thing to find that we somehow lost, an item to buy, a type of thing to possess that is outside of ourselves or that another person will be the magic ingredient to solve all of our worries and problems. I believe through the consumerism and entertainment culture we have screaming at us 24/7 that we’re programmed to believe we aren’t happy. What does it mean to be happy?

My dear readers, I believe happiness is 100% an inside job and the truth is that we aren’t going to feel perpetual happiness 100% of the time. Being human means that we have a wide array of feelings and emotions that alert us to what our body needs in each moment. Attending to each is sometimes a challenge, especially in our fast paced society yet taking the time to truly do so has amazing and priceless benefits.

We are coming up on a year since the beginning of the pandemic that changed our entire world. I’m incredibly grateful for the extended time and opportunity to work on myself and heal. Feeling is so very healing yet we must allow ourselves to truly feel all of it, the complete human experience doesn’t come with just the good vibes my dears. Since my Dad has passed and I have been separated from my partner, I am realizing more and more how precious we are to one another. My partner serves as the most clear of mirrors and our connection allows me to see myself fully. Lately, some hard truths rose to the surface that my ego needed to hear but didn’t enjoy hearing. I’ve changed every aspect of my life for the betterment of my own soul. Awesome for me yet he admitted to not knowing who I am anymore, that he needs to get to know and fall in love with me again. I must allow him time and space in which to do this. We are each others one true love and through acceptance of one another, I believe our love will get us through.

Life is like a freshly squeezed glass of orange juice with the juiciest bits all mixed in, not merely on top but sprinkled in throughout. We must dig deep at times to feel the most of what life is teaching us. Using the juice analogy, each container tells us to shake before we pour so we get the best of its offering into each glass. Life shakes us up repeatedly and at times it’s easy to feel all mixed up. The truth is happiness is always available should we choose to feel it. However it’s perfectly normal to not feel happy all the damn time!! Being…..just being, tapping into my skills of observation allows me to investigate all of my feelings through all of my senses. For a women who feels deeply and is acutely sensitive this can be extremely challenging. I sometimes wish I had an off switch and could just feel and process me, not everyone else around me. As an open psychic channel, my soul asked to be reincarnated this way yet it’s hard explaining this fact to others unless they have experience with it.

From the inception of this blog, Emotional Musings has served as a testimony to what life is like for me in recovery from life long dissociation and trauma. I’m an empath, an open psychic channel, a trauma survivor, a suicide survivor, a divorced mother diagnosed with CPTSD who searched for answers to find peace and healing to discover that all of my sensibilities allow me to follow my soul’s purpose and path to becoming a master shaman. God set me with all the sense settings on high and He gifted me with being able to write poems that can articulate the abundance of feelings I feel all the time.

These are my latest lessons in life that are expressed through poetry. This last full moon was a big one for me in terms of looking within the shadows to release what no longer was serving me. Healing hurts my dears and this past week I have felt every feeling and emotion there is. I’m exhausted, elated, sad, grateful and yes, happy. I’m happy to be alive and experience all of life in the skin I’m in! Tomorrow I am going to experience float therapy which I have read rave reviews about. I already know that this therapeutic experience will rejuvenate and refresh my spirit returning me to a place of balance and harmony.

Thank you so much @myjourney_sda for allowing me to share my testimony of survival to “Triumphing over Trauma”. We are all in this together, sharing our journey, challenges and gifts. We rise as one. Much love to you all ❤

Stay true to YOU
“Love is the Medicine”

In light and in shadow, always with love. If you’re interested in a shamanic healing session, tarot card reading, my recorded meditations or to purchase any of my 4 books of poetry please click the link below or click the Services tab in the menu.
For a personalized autographed copy please send me an email and use my PayPal account for payment. Maria@emotionalmusings.com
https://linktr.ee/Ladysag77
paypal.me/tinyd9

Consciousness, Healing, personal development, Spirituality

Eternal love is the breath of life

My dear readers, I have written often about the self healing techniques, rituals and ceremonies I practice in order to stay connected to my authentic self and to further integrate my soul into my being. Yesterday I took part in another breathquest ceremony that my dear friend Chrissy-Marie hosts via her Voyagers membership group that can be accessed here https://theartofaliveness.mykajabi.com/ Conscious breathing is so beneficial to welcoming in more life force energy which is what brings overall well-being to our body, mind and spirit. Directing such energy helps rid the body of stress and trauma, allowing for further expansion. The more room one can create internally, the more freedom one feels. It’s invigorating my dear ones!

I’ve been taking part in these monthly ceremonies for over ten months. I can firmly attest to the abundance of overall harmony I feel once the release of stagnant energy takes place where trauma has been locked in my body. The areas that are most impacted are the autonomic nervous system (ANS) which is connected to physical processes such as digestion, respiration, heart rate, immune function, and peristalsis. Also the sympathetic nervous system (SNS) which is our fight-or-flight response. For someone like me with CPTSD, this has benefited me most in regulating this response so that I can be more present while helping me focus and meditate much easier.

This information is quoted in an article I read to research conscious breathing and its benefits, and can be found at https://kripalu.org/resources/benefits-conscious-breathing-body-and-mind

“The other branch of the system is the parasympathetic nervous system (PNS), often called the “rest and digest” or “calm and connect” system, which allows us to recoup from the stressors of life. If you find yourself breathing slowly and deeply, feeling a sense of calm and peacefulness, your PNS is activated, enhancing digestion, increasing blood flow to the GI track, lowering the heart rate, and enhancing sexual arousal. This system also activates certain parts of the brain, dampening fear-response regions and increasing the reflective, responsive regions. The result? More reflective, conscious behavior and action; an increased feeling of calm; and greater mental flexibility and creativity amid life’s challenges”.

The work I practice as a shaman requires me to read energy on other dimensions and has me dance with irrationality. I’m a storyteller for the soul, therefore it’s important for my being to be as healthy, neutral and well attuned as possible. These breathing techniques have helped shift my own consciousness and behavior in innumerable and priceless ways. I’ve begun teaching the art of shamanism while maintaining a steady client base and by God’s grace I have become quite busy. This week I really needed this breath course to reconnect with my soul, breathe and rejuvenate myself. I took a much needed day off yesterday and enjoyed restful sleep. Being still, feeling calmness and tremendous inner peace is a reward for all the hard work and dedication I give to this craft, my way of life as I walk the shamanic path.

For it is in breathing that we can let go, allowing more truth and love into our being. These little deaths create new beginnings. In the moments one feels anxious and wants to hold (breath) is the exact moment our body desires us to release and breathe. When we feel the urgency to speed up is actually the time we need to slow down. Breathing deep and often, consciously makes all of these actions flow more easily and helps us make more healthful decisions.

These two poems embody how my soul feels. Connecting to etetnal love, which supports all life in the Universe and how vital it is to feel the breath of life. The amount of aliveness one feels is directly related to one’s soul’s health. Healing the soul, connecting all parts of self spreads love throughout our human operating system. This allows us to be as whole as possible and as joyful, peaceful and loving as we want. I highly recommend you try it my dear ones! Breath is life!

Breath is freedom
Love supports all life

In light and in shadow, always with love. If you’re interested in a shamanic healing session, tarot card reading, my recorded meditations or to purchase any of my 4 books of poetry please click the link below. For a personalized autographed copy please send me an email and use my PayPal account for payment.
https://linktr.ee/Ladysag77
paypal.me/tinyd9

Consciousness, Healing, Spirituality

Soul freedom 2021

I write about my emotions and those of others around me within this blog. That’s why I call it “Emotional Musings”. We are four days into this new year of 2021 and I can feel the door many of us have walked through that has given further rise in humanity’s elevation and ascension within our evolutionary process. I have been given lots of signs and information already from my guides. In this post I will share with you my poems and art that has further activated my soul’s purpose and freedom!

In my last post https://emotionalmusings.com/2020/12/28/whats-your-word-for-2020-2/ I shared that my word for 2020 was beauty. This is the word I chose at the end of the year. The one I chose at the beginning of 2020 was create. By setting clear intentions and goals, I created a whole new life for myself as a writer and shaman. I released three books last year that I’m immensely proud of and finished my master certification to become a shamanic healer. Both are incredibly important to my own healing journey and my soul’s purpose. This year for 2021, my word is freedom. In every sense of the word, I choose to remain free. My soul’s spirit is free from the judgements and opinions of others or any constraints that previously blocked its ability to sing, to love and to live! I continually strive towards financial freedom, something that has eluded me in the ten years since my divorce. Freedom to feel all of me, the intricate parts of self and soul. Integration of Serena, who I call my soul, and Maria Teresa, my birth name.

When I started this blog two years ago my main objective was to be as transparent as possible in regards to my journey through mental health, emotional breakdowns and breakthroughs which led me onto the spiritual life path I travel today. I want for all of my dear readers here to feel heard, seen and loved. To have hope enlivened, faith restored and love injected directly into your souls! We only get such a short time in this precious life, to experience consciousness in these human forms we inhabit. My intention is to inspire others to heal, live out their dreams and best life according to their soul.

I recently watched the Disney Pixar movie, “Soul” and felt inspired to share my spark here with you all my dear ones. Through my poetry and the healing I perform as a shaman, my soul sings loudly and freely. Another psychically inclined woman who I consider a soul sister wrote that we are Spirit’s “boots on the ground” and I firmly believe that! Please follow her blog at https://missdorrina.com I am a mere conduit for Spirit and it’s a real honor to share their wisdom with others. Together, I vow to do my part in helping to raise the vibration here on Earth, to heal humanity one heart at a time.

My most favorite Dead song ever because it speaks directly to my deep purple, turquoise and green soul. Listen to their best version of “Eyes of the World” from 1977, the year of my birth, at Englishtown, NJ (I’m a NJ native)

I make small promises to myself everyday along with intentions that I burn during shamanic rituals. I listen intently to to the guided messages from Spirit. I love deeply. This poem and painting is dedicated to my soul’s burst of 6 soul sisters and our eternal connection. We have all found one another and come back together in 2020. I want us to reunite in person this year! A soul reunion ✨

Colors of my soul

After I sit in my morning meditation is when I feel the most poetic energy influences flowing. These come directly from Source. The Divine. The angels, ascended masters, my ancestors, spirit guides and highest and holiest vibrational beings of light.

The only vaccine we need

Lastly, this poem is one I wrote to process some of my own observations regarding interactions in the relationships we have with one another. Awakening to my soul has afforded me a pause button, to really see the truth in life and what others serve to teach me here. It’s an ever unfolding, always fascinating and awe inspiring process. To view the internal struggle from an energetic perspective.

Shine love towards one another

Until next time my dears, keep staying curious about your intentions in life. Release what no longer serves you, love hard and live the life as the tremendously beautiful gift it is!

In light and in shadow, always with love. If you’re interested in a shamanic healing session, tarot card reading, my recorded meditations or to purchase any of my 4 books of poetry please click the link below. For a personalized autographed copy please send me an email and use my PayPal account for payment.
https://linktr.ee/Ladysag77
paypal.me/tinyd9

Spirituality

Celebrating my Aliveness

I’m so pleased to share with you my dear readers and loved ones here in our little WordPress community the interview I did with my dear soul sister Chrissy-Marie Tucciarone, for her podcast on iTunes and Spotify called “The Art of Aliveness”. I recorded this in early July, before I started the 40 hours of apprenticeship healing sessions and right after the release of my 3rd book of poetry, “My Heart’s Song”. She asked me some great questions allowing me to share my healing journey thus far with a huge concentration on my art.

I describe myself as a creative person because I feel my sensuality and drive come from my love for anything that helps me express myself in an artistic way including writing, dancing, yoga, painting, chanting, singing, music and now the shamanic healing sessions I conduct. I see the world in technicolor orchestrated by a wide array of musical tastes from Classical, Jazz, R&B, The Dead, Reggae, EDM, Classic Rock and everything in between. There’s really no beat I’ve ever met I didn’t like my dears💃 Being able to express myself artistically is like breathing for me. It’s how I roll.

As I landed in Denver, the city I was connecting through from Idaho before my final destination in Fort Lauderdale, I saw a notification pop up on my cell from Chrissy telling me our episode #27 was live on the podcast platforms! I bought some snacks, found a place to plug in my device and started to listen. I must admit, this is my first ever interview on my own life’s story. I’ve been involved in other interviews with my partner because he’s a Superbowl Champion but this was the first time I would speak from my heart on my own journey from darkness to light. It’s an overwhelming honor and I feel a lump in my throat just writing about it now. Here’s the link. I invite all of you to have a listen….

Here’s a show for you… Turning Your Sensitivities into Superpowers episode of The Art of Aliveness
https://open.spotify.com/episode/2oHlTQSL3FXHlGPSy8w5KS?si=reXlit1USVuEGLMAUQHyjg

Episode #27 “The Art of Aliveness” Turning your Sensitivities into Superpowers

I want to share with you my dear readers, some wisdom from Steven D. Farmer. He is a Soul Healer, shamanic practitioner, ordained minister and licensed psychotherapist. I adore his many books and tarot card decks. I have taken to heart so many of his words, most especially these❤

“All wounds stem from the illusion of separation from Source and of all Creation. The route of healing this wound is through cultivating love and compassion for every being on this planet, including oneself. Not a bland standard of unquestioned acceptance, but a heartfelt sense of profound relatedness to whatever you perceive as apart from yourself. True compassion requires not only a feeling of warmth that emanates when you are in touch with your heart center, but in acts of kindness, even if this means being a fully attentive listener. Respect the fact that your heart is both a giver (putting out electrical energy) and a receiver (drawing in magnetic energy). These energies are best sensed by attending to the steady flow of your breathing while also noticing your heart center. Righteousness, fear, anger and judgement are some common ways to block one’s natural desire to love. Forgiveness is not only letting go of judgement, but also seeing through the illusion that you and All-That-Is are separate. Look about you and inside of you, and do your best to love whatever you see”.

In order to do this, I had to first forgive myself and welcome in many vital values we all require to thrive as human beings. I had been rejecting myself and needed to cultivate self love, trust and belief 15 months ago when I felt I could no longer carry the burden of being sexually abused. I have wanted to get a tattoo of a semicolon for awhile now and I felt that I needed to get it done in Idaho.

In 2011, I found myself in a very dark place my dear readers. I felt so burdened by shame, guilt, unworthiness and hopelessness. I attempted to turn out my light completely. The main mission of my writing and the reason I became a shaman is to let others see we can and do heal. My hope is fully restored and my life-force energy is extremely strong. The motto I live my life by is “Triumphing over Trauma” and today I proudly walk with my head held high. You are never alone my dears. Ever!

September 10th is #worldsuicidepreventionday and I put the ; on my middle finger as an everlasting statement & symbol to myself to remember where I came from and how profoundly impactful this healing journey has been. I got this the day after the final ritual ceremony, a full circle moment 🙏

Semicolon movement, “My story isn’t over yet”

My heart is at peace, I am filled with joy, feeling 100% content with life. It’s a well deserved place to be after the pain and heartache from the many lessons in life I learned the hard way. The pain from the human experience is something we are all continually healing from. It’s never-ending and everlasting while we walk this planet. I believe that each and everyone of us can and does heal in our own ways. It’s hardwired in our DNA to heal. I’m honored and blessed to help others heal as I did in the ways of shamanism. As a shaman, I help others connect to their own natural rhythm, retrieve their soul’s purpose and balance the chakra points in the body, our energy centers that govern our being allowing us the most optimized functionality possible. This is my magic and what I’m meant to do.

If you’re curious about any of my 3 books of poetry or what to contact me for a shamanic healing session or a tarot card reading. Click this link below.

https://linktr.ee/Ladysag77

Spirituality

Heart’s a flutter

Since Saturday’s Lion’s Gate portal opening and breathwork ceremony that I took part in I have been feeling on top of the world my dear readers! The ceremony was especially powerful delivering so much continued healing for my mind, body and spirit. If you get an opportunity to participate in a breathwork class, do it!! Breathwork is extremely transformative and fosters healing on a physical, mental and spiritual level giving your body just what it needs. It helps to relive or re-experience traumatic events and process deep emotional wounds. The practice is also somatic and weaves together mindfulness and sound vibrations in such a way that I find incredibly soothing. My entire body buzzes as I can hear my own blood flowing through my body. I have laughed, cried and moaned creating noises that are guttural in nature and deliver a feeling of tremendous bliss afterwards. This particular session was extremely visual thanks to my spirit guides and the information shared with me from Divine. My dear soul sister Chrissy Marie holds them once or twice a month via Zoom. Check her out on Instagram @comealivewithchrissymarie

My heart is so incredibly full and expansive. As an intuitive empath, I usually receive clues regarding such transformative events beforehand that I know will impact me in this way and it was no surprise to me that Friday afternoon while sitting in my favorite park I felt a rush of serene energy wash over me. My entire aura turned blue in color which represents an eased nervous system, a balanced existence that alchemizes life force energy into an overall feeling of cool, calm and collectedness. It felt like my entire body, mind and spirit took a deep breath and was relieved….a real AH-HA moment. I wrote this poem soon after sitting with myself for what felt like hours🥰

Restoration of faith

On Sunday my son Ty and I spent the entire day outdoors enjoying the beautiful but super hot and steamy weather here in South Florida. My mindset continued to shift and process what I like to refer to as waves of change in a much less resistant manner than that of the last three months. I believe all the deeply concentrated inner and introspective work I have been doing is finally paying off coupled with a more relaxed astral energy in our cosmos currently. It’s a welcomed breath of fresh air for sure!

Waves of change

August is a big month for my family and friends birthday wise. I have a long list of loved ones that celebrate their revolution around the Sun this month. My niece and goddaughter turned 21 yesterday which is such a milestone birthday. I am so blessed to have played an integral role in her upbringing and was the 3rd person to hold her after she was born! Gabriela was the first baby born between my two closest sisters and I, her birth was incredibly monumental for our family. Here is a picture of our first meeting and the poem I wrote in her honor to celebrate and remember the day.

First time I held Gabriela
Happy 21st birthday

I’ve decided to take the rest of this month to continue processing and enjoy my newly found footing and freedom of spirit. I won’t be posting here for at least the next two weeks and have also decided to take a much needed detox from my other social media platforms. Going off the grid by putting myself in an intentional blackout is good for my self care. I will continue my other writing practices, I just won’t be posting anything publicly. I have been receiving many messages that it’s time for me to start writing my long awaited memoir, a project I have been contemplating for many years now. I would like to take the rest of August to get started on that and see where it leads me.

If you’d like to contact me for a tarot card reading, shamanic healing session or check out my three books of poetry please follow this link below. It’s a one stop place for everything Maria Teresa and Emotional Musings. Enjoy the rest of your summer my dear ones. So much love to you all😎

https://linktr.ee/Ladysag77