Consciousness, Healing, Health, personal development

My Soul’s Journey, Part 3

I put the finishing touches on my latest book, “My Soul’s Journey” over the weekend and tomorrow, June 1st, I will hit the publish button releasing my 5th collection of poetry to the world! I’m so elated by what this book has taught me, both in writing the poems contained in it and putting it all together in book form. This is my greatest labor of love to date. I started sharing my writing publicly on this platform in October of 2018 and published my 1st book of poetry entitled “Emotional Musings” in January of 2019. It fills me with such joy to see the progression of the many messages I channel and how much they have helped me to heal. The more I heal, the more of myself I reveal.

Heart wide open

My journey of healing proves that love heals and that stress and fear drains our life force energy causing stress and illness. Since I have been practicing the art of shamanism, meditating, following a pescatarian diet, moving my body regularly while expressing myself creatively on a daily basis for two years now I can appreciate the major shift in wellness to my mind, body and soul’s health. Taking this holistic approach has freed me from old programming, conditioning and toxic energy. I am so grateful to have made connections with the people who have inspired these changes. Remembering my own Divine essence and my purpose in this life gets me up in the morning with a smile on my face and allows me to rest my head in peace by days end. I believe it is our basic nature to be loving, peaceful, balanced and harmonious. Unlearning the negative and toxic layers of fear, pain and suffering is the essence of our soul’s journey here.

My latest painting is a visual of my soul’s journey
Never let go of wonder and awe, surrender to it

This week I laced up my tap shoes and created  two videos of myself making noise with my feet. After I come back from a long run to the park where I sit and meditate in nature, I love putting on music that makes me feel alive. By doing this I connect to my inner child and can express what I’m feeling inside.

Get up and dance
Dancing raises my vibe and fuels the love superpowers I  share with my clients, what do you do to raise your vibe?

The day after the powerful full moon in Gemini and lunar eclipse in Sagittarius, I performed at my first poetry slam since pre pandemic days. The last one I attended was in Dallas in February of 2020. Boy, does that feel like a lifetime ago! The MC for the might announced to the crowd that I was delivered to them directly from Jesus because my name is Maria Teresa. I often get compared to Mother Teresa and the archangels which is such an incredible honor. I was the first poet to take the stage, performing “If I Were”, “Daddy” and “Look Closer” which will all be featured in the book. Here’s a short clip from the slam…..

“If I Were”

My mission here is to spread love, pure and simple. We are all made from love. Love is the only thing that is real my dear readers. Love yourself, fill your cup and drink it all in. There can never be too much love! May we all share love with one another. I believe love is the one thing that will save our world. I love each and everyone of you.

Love’s arrival is always on time

If you’re interested in a shamanic healing session, tarot card reading, my recorded meditations and other ritualistic services I provide or to purchase any of my 4 books of poetry please click the link below or click the Services tab in the menu on my website.
For a personalized autographed copy of any of my books, please send me an email and use my PayPal account for payment.
Maria@emotionalmusings.com
https://linktr.ee/Emotionalmusings
paypal.me/tinyd9

In light and in shadow, always with love. Namaste.

Grief and loss, Healing, Spirituality

My Soul’s Journey, Part 2

Today marks six months since my Dad passed over into the world of spirit. Writing a book is a very cathartic experience. The poems in this collection for my 5th book entitled, “My Soul’s Journey ” were originally written between early November 2020 through March 2021, documenting the time shortly before my Dad’s passing up until the first days of Spring. While I write this manuscript, I’m reliving memories and feelings that are all still so fresh while running through the gamut of emotions. Writing is and always will be where my soul emerges from a place of confusion and then rises to clarity, like the tone of a singing bowl, as I process through all of my senses. My intention is to honor both my Dad and myself by publishing the poems that helped me understand my role as a shaman, a mother, a daughter, a sister, an aunt and a friend through the most amazing yet painful times of my life.

I focus often on how it’s important to allow the lessons life has for us to teach us to embrace ALL aspects, from as many perspectives as can be gleamed from for the wisdom each of them holds. As I transcribe each poem, I’m reminded of the environment from which my words were birthed. What sparked the message to come through and how did writing each poem help me to understand myself in the moment. Often I find myself bursting into tears as I allow the medicine in the message to wash over my soul again, but in a deeper and more profound way having put space between the time it was written until now. This book is different because I took a deliberate pause after writing these poems for almost two months before beginning this manuscript. For the previous four books, I wrote the poems and immediately thereafter the manuscript was constructed and published. This book serves to teach me a bigger lesson, one my soul has been striving to learn for many, many years. Patience.

While following the many steps it requires to build a manuscript, I don’t write a lot of original new works. However, a kindred spirited friendship and sisterhood that began right here on WordPress, evolved from a deep resonance of soul recognition and purity of love thus inspiring me to do a collaboration. Ace of http://fearlessfreesoul.com and I immediately connected at the end of last year because our writing styles are so similar. We both use love with the absence of fear as our medicine and magic. She creates the most amazing videos on empowerment and positivity. Her old soul spirit instantly reminded me of my youngest son Miles and our relationship grew from commenting on one another’s posts to a personal correspondence by text and voice clips. I have never collaborated with another writer before and I am truly honored to do so with such a gifted writer with such a big heart! Our duet is a match made in heaven,, divinely timed and powered! These are two of the poems we wrote together this past week and I’m filled with such joy to share them with you all here.

It’s important to allow myself breaks in between all the work it takes to write a book. You my dear readers know how much I love to spend time dancing and listening to music because it fires up my spirit while setting it free. May these three dance videos bring you joy and laughter as it served my heart good to make them.

Salsa anyone?
Love Foolosophy
I love the way my finger cymbals sound with this song, “Dancing by the River” Manish Vyas

Please check out two new features in the menu tab, one is a gallery of some pictures including my healing crystal grids and a video explaining my healing sessions. The other is a collection of testimonials from my clients on how our sessions have impacted their healing journey. Remember my dear ones, every day do whatever you feel brings your song of self out and sing it loudly for all the world to hear!

Sing, sing your song

If you’re interested in a shamanic healing session, tarot card reading, my recorded meditations and other ritualistic services I provide or to purchase any of my 4 books of poetry please click the link below or click the Services tab in the menu on my website.
For a personalized autographed copy of any of my books, please send me an email and use my PayPal account for payment.
Maria@emotionalmusings.com
https://linktr.ee/Emotionalmusings
paypal.me/tinyd9

In light and in shadow, always with love. Namaste.

Spirituality

Bloom where you grow

On days like today, I don’t avoid the rain but purposely go out into it, with my bike or on foot. Today I chose my bike. I like to go for long rides up to 20 miles on some days. The last time I rode in the rain I was annoyed, frustrated and just wanted to get it over. Today’s ride was born from those feelings, they are what drove me out into the storm. The rain holds the magic in which I cleanse my soul while drenching my entire being and allows for clarity. Often in these past two weeks, I have felt utterly lost in emotion.

“Lost”

I have been running from myself for years. Avoiding, dissociating, distracting myself with many different things like abusing alcohol, over exercising, excessive talking and other people’s troubles. Anything to not feel me. Lately I have discovered the wisdom in stillness and quiet. Emotional dysfunction whispers lies yet my soul knows there is always hope. I no longer have the luxury of doing the types of activities and maladaptive behaviors that keep me separated from myself, they have officially run their course. As I write this post, the two songs that have played from my playlist were Phil Collins, “In the Air Tonight” and Bill Withers “Lean on Me”. Both are appropriate for this post because their lyrics shine light on exactly how I have been feeling these past couple of weeks. My feelings have brought me to another layer of shedding what no longer serves, letting go of attachments to allow for my authentic self to come through. Thank you God for showing me in practical, real life instances to lean on you. I certainly have felt this coming for some time, especially at night.

“Attached”

Learning to become a shamanic healer has taught me that I must first face the challenges in my life, the very ones that I’ve avoided in order to fully help others in their own healing. I must first heal my own soul as a requirement for this role. It’s been whispering to me, “it’s time Maria” and “you can do this”. All the while I have felt so utterly alone. Despite living with both my parents and my son. This minus my partner has made my heart feel so blue without him. He’s my best friend and companion, the person who nudges me out of my seriousness and all the pressure I put upon myself. He accepts me fully no questions asked. We made arrangements for his arrival this week that have been unfortunately postponed for the time being due to circumstances beyond both of our control. That question of “what is in my control” has been popping up a lot lately and I have been taking a lot of what’s been going on personally, which does me no good. I learn so much about myself through our relationship which a big reason I respect, admire and love him as I do. This time apart has presented another opportunity for me to fully accept myself, on my own. I feel so different since we were last together and fear started creeping in again. Would he still love me?

“Mirror”

My ride today solidified that the way I was going about this situation isn’t serving me best. I can’t look to anyone or anything to give me these answers. During these long wet rides, I talk to myself and God. That’s when it hit me, I have to rely on God who aids my own inner strength for these realizations. I’m meant to be alone for a bit longer and really I’m never truly alone. That’s an illusion my mind has been telling myself forever, since my confusing childhood years that were loud and scary. As a middle child, I have always had others around me. I have lived alone for very short amount of time in my life. In the total of my 42 years I’ve probably spent less than one year on my own. The light that shines brightly within can’t be denied and I love myself for knowing that, for feeling that again.

Since May, moving and starting this apprenticeship I have seen the different aspects of my being that I have avoided, tried to erase, betrayed and denied. If one is to be whole, ALL of these parts must be integrated into an I AM mantra and belief. There is no separation, no duality, no personality that owns my whole. For I AM all of them which today gives me comfort, no longer fear or shame.

I keep writing throughout all of these realizations and ah-ha moments. This morning after meditation, the message I kept hearing was, “Maria, bloom where you grow”. Then I wrote this poem. While I’m writing this paragraph, Dolly Parton’s “Wildflowers” is playing. This song is exactly how I have felt my entire life. Listen my dear readers…..

Lao Tzu said, “Trying to understand is like straining through muddy water. Have the patience to wait! Be still and allow the mud to settle.” Patience is a virtue I have been cultivating in my garden of growth for years now. After my bike ride arriving home, I feel at peace and I can say the water is running clear my dear readers.

Please check out my three books of poetry available now on Amazon at the links below

Spirituality

My grateful heart

This post is bursting with love and gratitude for all of the wonderful things taking place in my life. My heart is so full and happy my dear readers and I just want to share this wonderful news with you all🥰

I finally got a new laptop, WooHoo, which is making writing so much easier and much less tedious. I had been using my midgrade Android cell phone with a stylus to tap out each post, one letter at a time. That’s how dedicated and determined I am to write. As you can imagine, typing on a laptop is a breeze in comparison! I have started to assemble the manuscript for the 2nd book of poetry I will soon be self publishing on Amazon. This is something I have been planning for months and I’m so excited to release it, I’m calling it, “My Soul’s Language”. Stay tuned for the official release information my dear readers.

In a few previous posts I shared that I have decided to learn to become a Shamanic healer under the tutelage of my dear friend, Reiki master and Shamanic healer Lindsey Luna aka @soul.healing.with.luna (her Instagram handle) and yesterday we made plans to officially begin my apprenticeship early next month! Lindsey has been so I instrumental in my healing process for the last 10 months and I consider her a soul sister, kindred spirit. Her magic has successfully retrieved my soul and aligned my chakras so that I can step into my power. Realizing my soul’s purpose is something I struggle to put into words that can express fully the immense feelings of love and gratitude that I feel. The entire experience has changed my life and to know that once I learn how to do this myself, I will have the opportunity to help heal others is so life affirming! The only words that keep running through my head, like on an electronic banner, are thank you God🙏

It’s no coincidence that I find myself being able to see my path through at this point in my life. We are all in the Great Awakening process and these seeds were planted months back. I can feel myself on the verge of something great, I am not sure what it is but I can feel it in my bones and believe that wonderful things are about to happen for me in my life. I have been patiently following the bread crumbs Universe and Divine spirit provide. I keep in close communication with God and I can feel the support, love and protection all around holding me up in grace. Again, thank you God for bringing me here to this understanding of myself and your mission for me.

Last week I listened to my dear friend Chrissy Marie’s podcast, “The Art of Aliveness” (on Spotify, see below for the link) and I shared with you dear readers what magic she is able to facilitate with her own energetic healing practices. She interviewed an incredibly intriguing gentleman named Joel Adofin who is considered a Divine Catalyst and Supernatural Creative. While listening to their chat I felt goose bumps, chills and heard myself saying YES, outloud because he was confirming everything I have been experiencing in my own life for the past 10 months! I knew immediately that I was to work with him so I reached out and booked a session for Friday. Here is a brief description of how the session will go:

This session gives us the chance to work with multiple aspects of the Divine – channeled messages & Divine Grace. I am able to deliver messages if they come through. There is space to ask for clarification and time for discussion at the end.

For the next two days, while quietly sitting in meditation, I will prepare the questions I have for Joel to help answer. I am confident that I will hear exactly what I need to because I know the Universe has my back and is preparing me for that something great I feel coming.

For so many years I have read about what hope and faith are but only now do I truly feel this way and can see how holding these two values so dearly has been working in my life. I have devouted myself to caring for my spirit and have strengthened my love for God and all of the blessings he makes available in my life. It brings me to tears of joy and love. I just now my head and whisper “Thank you God” and Namaste. This is my latest poem expressing my gratitude for it all. Nothing but peace, love and light my dear readers ✌❤🌠

Namaste

Please check out my 1st book of poetry entitled, “Emotional Musings” available now on Amazon The 2nd offering of poetry is now available entitled, “My Soul’s Language” also on Amazon.

Mental health

My 2nd Poetry Slam

I’m continuing to get on the microphone and dramatically read my poems. When I was younger and studying all forms of dance my dream was to dance on Broadway. I do love the thrill and terror that comes from being on a stage.

Last night’s slam was very intimate and cozy. I met some wonderful artists and even made plans to host a book signing with the promoter of this event who was so welcoming and made me feel so valued as an artist. This is called “Nothing But Poetry Live” and it helps showcase artists in and around Dallas, TX. I really love being around other creative people in this performance capacity!! I have found my people! Being seen and heard, my personal feelings landing with my own unique flare is so empowering. I was asked if I have a music accompaniment to go with my poems last night. I will be doing a collaboration with an old dear friend of mine from high school who is one of the most amazing guitar players I have ever heard and have the pleasure to know.

I asked the promoter Sam, to video me since I attended this event solo last night. This poem is called “Losing my best friend” and is inspired by what’s going on with my partner who is my best friend. My fiance played and retired from professional football with both the NFL and Arena football leagues. Watching and witnessing his struggle with mental illness including memory loss, hearing voices and not knowing who he is at times is beyond heartbreaking. Ironically, he wanted to attend with me last evening but had an anxiety attack that kept him from leaving our apartment. He later admitted how hard it is to see me in pain over what’s happening to him. I know he can’t help it and I don’t take any of it personally because I know how much he supports and loves me. My writing has always served as an outlet for me to process my feelings. This entire situation is hard for both of us yet I know he is my biggest fan even if he can’t show it 100% of the time.

I was having a conversation with my oldest son yesterday about how fast time goes by. I believe it passes even quicker as we age. He wasn’t too thrilled to hear that but I said it just makes every moment more precious. I want to stay mindful in each of them as much as possible to fully enjoy my life these days. I’ve squandered so much time in anxiety, depression and suicidal thoughts. It’s been 9 years since I was in and out of a psychiatric hospital myself with complications from CPTSD. These days, I celebrate my life and am intensely grateful for all of it! This is what “Triumphing over Trauma” looks like…..

“Losing my best friend”

This year is my year for transformation, a metamorphosis. I am going after my dreams by keeping my foot on that gas pedal and making the most out of this momentum energy I’m cultivating by doing it. It’s so exciting and it makes me feel so alive to be up on a stage again. Keep watching as this free spirit spreads her wings and soars high🦋