Healing, Mental health, Spirituality

The pursuit of happiness

There are so many analogies that come to mind when I think of the phrase, “the pursuit of happiness”. Our culture breeds this idea that it’s a thing to find that we somehow lost, an item to buy, a type of thing to possess that is outside of ourselves or that another person will be the magic ingredient to solve all of our worries and problems. I believe through the consumerism and entertainment culture we have screaming at us 24/7 that we’re programmed to believe we aren’t happy. What does it mean to be happy?

My dear readers, I believe happiness is 100% an inside job and the truth is that we aren’t going to feel perpetual happiness 100% of the time. Being human means that we have a wide array of feelings and emotions that alert us to what our body needs in each moment. Attending to each is sometimes a challenge, especially in our fast paced society yet taking the time to truly do so has amazing and priceless benefits.

We are coming up on a year since the beginning of the pandemic that changed our entire world. I’m incredibly grateful for the extended time and opportunity to work on myself and heal. Feeling is so very healing yet we must allow ourselves to truly feel all of it, the complete human experience doesn’t come with just the good vibes my dears. Since my Dad has passed and I have been separated from my partner, I am realizing more and more how precious we are to one another. My partner serves as the most clear of mirrors and our connection allows me to see myself fully. Lately, some hard truths rose to the surface that my ego needed to hear but didn’t enjoy hearing. I’ve changed every aspect of my life for the betterment of my own soul. Awesome for me yet he admitted to not knowing who I am anymore, that he needs to get to know and fall in love with me again. I must allow him time and space in which to do this. We are each others one true love and through acceptance of one another, I believe our love will get us through.

Life is like a freshly squeezed glass of orange juice with the juiciest bits all mixed in, not merely on top but sprinkled in throughout. We must dig deep at times to feel the most of what life is teaching us. Using the juice analogy, each container tells us to shake before we pour so we get the best of its offering into each glass. Life shakes us up repeatedly and at times it’s easy to feel all mixed up. The truth is happiness is always available should we choose to feel it. However it’s perfectly normal to not feel happy all the damn time!! Being…..just being, tapping into my skills of observation allows me to investigate all of my feelings through all of my senses. For a women who feels deeply and is acutely sensitive this can be extremely challenging. I sometimes wish I had an off switch and could just feel and process me, not everyone else around me. As an open psychic channel, my soul asked to be reincarnated this way yet it’s hard explaining this fact to others unless they have experience with it.

From the inception of this blog, Emotional Musings has served as a testimony to what life is like for me in recovery from life long dissociation and trauma. I’m an empath, an open psychic channel, a trauma survivor, a suicide survivor, a divorced mother diagnosed with CPTSD who searched for answers to find peace and healing to discover that all of my sensibilities allow me to follow my soul’s purpose and path to becoming a master shaman. God set me with all the sense settings on high and He gifted me with being able to write poems that can articulate the abundance of feelings I feel all the time.

These are my latest lessons in life that are expressed through poetry. This last full moon was a big one for me in terms of looking within the shadows to release what no longer was serving me. Healing hurts my dears and this past week I have felt every feeling and emotion there is. I’m exhausted, elated, sad, grateful and yes, happy. I’m happy to be alive and experience all of life in the skin I’m in! Tomorrow I am going to experience float therapy which I have read rave reviews about. I already know that this therapeutic experience will rejuvenate and refresh my spirit returning me to a place of balance and harmony.

Thank you so much @myjourney_sda for allowing me to share my testimony of survival to “Triumphing over Trauma”. We are all in this together, sharing our journey, challenges and gifts. We rise as one. Much love to you all ❤

Stay true to YOU
“Love is the Medicine”

In light and in shadow, always with love. If you’re interested in a shamanic healing session, tarot card reading, my recorded meditations or to purchase any of my 4 books of poetry please click the link below or click the Services tab in the menu.
For a personalized autographed copy please send me an email and use my PayPal account for payment. Maria@emotionalmusings.com
https://linktr.ee/Ladysag77
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Grief and loss, Healing

In memoriam

Yesterday was a glorious day for my family and I as we bid our final farewell to my Dad. My Mom was especially happy to hold this memorial service in their Catholic church 45 years to the day they had their first date. I was extremely honored to be the representative from the family to give the eulogy which included the poem I wrote “Daddy” just hours before he passed on November 24, 2020. This was the closure we all needed and the homecoming my Dad deserved.

For you Dad
“Daddy”

We continued the celebration of my Dad’s life with an Italian fest fit for the king he is, a luncheon that was held at his favorite restaurant which included family and close friends, about twenty people. My older sister flew in from Utah and my oldest brother drove down from Orlando. It was especially great to all be together again since we have all been separated by the pandemic. We laughed and we shed tears. We all shared our favorite memories of my Dad. I was so comforted by my family yesterday and it felt so good to be with the people I love the most. My partner is here (FINALLY) and he was and is my rock, grounding me through the grieving process. I’m so grateful and blessed to have these people in my life when I need them the most. My gratitude includes my dear friends that are scattered across the country and in other places around the world who have sent condolences with love including so many of you my dear readers. From the bottom of my heart, your love means so much to me. Connection is a key in healing because we all experience loss. This is a time we need to lean on each other.

My sister Tami arranged these beautiful flowers

I took this video of myself dancing hours before my partner’s arrival. I absolutely adore Janis Joplin’s style and fiery vocals. My partner often remarks on how I remind him of her so I felt it fitting to dance in tribute to her and my love for all of humanity. I put a piece of my heart into every creative thing I do. If I don’t feel passionate about it, I simply don’t do it. Life is precious and I intend to make the most of my time here doing what I love to do most which is expressing the depths of my creative soul in light and love!

“Piece of My Heart”

In light and in shadow, always with love. If you’re interested in a shamanic healing session, tarot card reading, my recorded meditations or to purchase any of my 4 books of poetry please click the link below or click the Services tab in the menu.
For a personalized autographed copy please send me an email and use my PayPal account for payment. Maria@emotionalmusings.com
https://linktr.ee/Ladysag77
paypal.me/tinyd9

Grief and loss, Healing

Feeling is healing

Often times we do whatever we can to mute, disconnect and halt our feelings. I know this process well my dear readers. Through the trauma, abuse and self destructive ways I attempted to stifle my feelings in the hopes of erasing what was going on, I came to understand there is no way to escape the pain. What I have learned my friends is the only way to truly live is by feeling, for that is healing. Listening to the notes of each heart song, brings me closer to my authentic self and creates a bridge to my soul. To feel is to heal which in turn elevates the soul.

This Saturday my family and I will bid an official farewell to my Dad. My Mom chose to hold the memorial on the same date as their first meeting which was a blind date, 45 years ago. It’s very special for her. I’m honored to be giving a reading during the Catholic mass that will be held in his honor and reciting my poem “Daddy” while the choir director plays “How Great Art Thou” my Dad’s favorite hymn. It’s also three months to the day he breathed his final breath, crossing over to the spirit realm, to be with God and the angels. I’ve been feeling lots of different emotions as you can imagine my dear ones. The difference of focus for me now is that I don’t judge my feelings. I surrender, I accept and I feel them. However they surface, with anger, with tears or with laughter. All of it serves.

Curiously investigating feelings to heal

This poem, “Inner Landscape” was recently named post of the day on the app I use, Mirakee, to create my poems. I have been using this app for over two years and this is the first time I have been recognized by this honor. I must tell you the sheer joy I felt receiving so much love, kindness and support from the writing community on the app and on the social media platforms I shared it on. My hope and prayer is that by sharing my journey of healing, of learning to live by my motto of “Triumphing over Trauma”, I can inspire others to do the same. This is another poem about healing, based upon chakra health which leads to a richness and wealth of well-being.

Chakra health =healing wealth

I would also like to share with you my dear readers a clip from a show I have been binging on Netflix called “The Magicians”. This clip is of the cast singing in remembrance of one of the lead characters, their dear friend who passes away tragically after a magic spell that leads to an unexpected outcome. It really impacted me as I watched it, tears spontaneously fell from my eyes and poured down my face. I’ve heard this song so many times ,yet not in this tempo, which allowed the meaning to shine light upon my own grief. We get such a short amount of time in this life for the people we connect with to leave an indelible mark upon our hearts that we may not recognize until they are gone. We are presented with that choice, to “Take on Me” when we love someone. These special relationships teach us so much. My Dad is the strongest and most humble person I have ever been blessed to know and love. He was a man of few words, the strong and silent type, so when he spoke he commanded attention and you listened. I’m so very honored to be his daughter, getting the opportunity to “take on him”.

Lastly, I will close this post with two other poems that reflect my heart and healing at this time along my journey. I urge each one of you my dear friends, tap into your heart, feel your feelings, heal and continue to discover your authentic self, which is your truth. It’s beautiful. It’s you!

Honor your spirit

In light and in shadow, always with love. If you’re interested in a shamanic healing session, tarot card reading, my recorded meditations or to purchase any of my 4 books of poetry please click the link below or click the Services tab in the menu.
For a personalized autographed copy please send me an email and use my PayPal account for payment.
https://linktr.ee/Ladysag77
paypal.me/tinyd9

Consciousness, Healing, personal development, Spirituality

Embracing the Healing Field

My dear readers, I’m so pleased to announce that I’m now an official contributer for Healers magazine based here in Miami, Florida. My first article can be read here https://healersmagazine.com/blog/ entitled “Embracing the Healing Field” which is a review of the documentary on Amazon of the same name. I was so intrigued by the information in it about the Quantum field of energy healing because of the profound experience I have had with it, I felt compelled to write the review sprinkled with my own life’s healing experience. I invite you my dear readers to click the link and read it. Please let me know your thoughts by commenting here or sending me an email.

A dear sister friend of mine requested I record some more videos of myself reciting my poems. Here are the two latest ones I shared on my social media platforms. The first one is dedicated to my muse, my partner and my best friend. The second is about my continued transformation as I heal my soul and fulfill my purpose to assist others in their healing process as a shaman. Please see my newly added complete list of services in the menu tab of this blog. I’m honored to work with others who are curious about what a shamanic healing session can bring into one’s life, healing past trauma and elevating the soul. Thank you so much to https://missdorrina.com/ for your love and support in helping me tweak this blog. Technology is not something I enjoy but a necessary part of blogging. Your assistance is greatly appreciated and absolutely priceless!

“Two as One”
“Opening”

These past 19 months have truly been life altering as I release what no longer serves me, live intentionally from my heart without hiding and expand further into the creative being I am. I absolutely love to dance and feel it’s the most freeing experience I regularly practice. This is me. 100% soul powered!

“Adventure of a Lifetime” by Coldplay
“Can You Feel It” by Michael Jackson

Life is an adventure that I can feel everyday. You can too my dear readers, it’s all in how you choose to look at it. Lately I’ve felt another expansive period of alignment with the Light, Divine Source. This is a poem I wrote after a meditation session. We are birthing change my dear ones and what the unknown will bring is whatever your imagination can dream!

“Birthing change”

In light and in shadow, always with love. If you’re interested in a shamanic healing session, tarot card reading, my recorded meditations or to purchase any of my 4 books of poetry please click the link below or click the Services tab in the menu.
For a personalized autographed copy please send me an email and use my PayPal account for payment.
https://linktr.ee/Ladysag77
paypal.me/tinyd9

Grief and loss, Healing, Spirituality

The light of love shines like a mirror

Imagine your being as a mirror, what are you reflecting out into the world? Are you living authentically, heart centered and open or are you closed, in fear and driven by the chaos. Finding a balance in between the two is where peace lies. Living by my soul’s purpose shows me the ways in which I can adjust my mirror on a daily basis so that I can be the best me possible and shine my bright light of love, my mirror upon others.

Humans were built for community, we need one another to grow and learn from. Some lessons are more challenging than others. This week has been a particularly emotional one for me as the waves of grief wash over me, processing the loss of my Dad was my main focus again. We heal in cycles my dear ones, being forever brought back to the places we need to go deeper into acceptance of. It all serves and healing never ceases. While riding my bike back and forth to the beach twice this week, about thirty miles or so altogether, I found myself repeating this mantra:

“I acknowledge, I surrender, I release, I accept”

There are no mute or pause buttons that are helpful for processing deep emotions. The best choice is to practice what these words mean, to heed their lesson. Awareness is the name of the game. I am all of what I feel by accepting whatever is coming up, leaning into it and dancing with its message. The medicine I choose is always love. The person who is responsible for loving all of me, is me. I retreat to the beach and allow the healing light of the Sun to work his magic. I also brought along some tiger’s eye crystals that are great for helping to release fear and anxiety and aids in achieving harmony and balance within. It stimulates taking action, and helps you to make decisions with discernment and understanding, becoming unclouded by your emotions. Practicing patience by surrendering to and allowing whatever shows up to wash through until a clear decision is reached.

Love is the best medicine

The app I use to create my poems is called Mirakee. Every day they ask the members to participate in creating a poem from a word prompt. It’s a fun way of writing and I am usually surprised at what flows out. The word that prompted this poem was”to write a poem based on our zodiac sign”. This poem “Firefly” is a celebration of those like me who are born under the zodiac sign of Sagittarius. Here’s to the wild, adventurous and freedom loving fellow Sagittarians!

Sagittarius ♐

In times like this I find it’s important to be extra gentle with myself and I practice this by breathing consciously and scheduling time for extra meditation. This week I was guided to focus on my heart chakra a bit more. This is the area of our body where most of us neglect and is the root cause for conditions like heart disease to manifest. Slowing down and paying closer attention to our hearts, while quieting the mind is essential to our well-being my dear readers. I invite you to tap into your heart and heal whatever comes up. This is where our truth lies.

Love over fear, the two can not coexist

Finally, as the God centered being I am, I turn to His lessons of love for all of creation, unity, harmony and balance. His grace and mercy are readily available to each and every one of us, believers and non believers alike. When we can tap into a power greater than ourselves it’s amazing what we can find. Call it the Universe, Mother Nature or God (I see them all as one force) When I can become still within this vibration, the great I AM comes forth and heals my soul. It is within each of us, supporting us, existing in all of nature that surrounds us. This belief soothes me most of all. And so it is. Amen. Amen. Amen.

God’s love is the greatest of all
The Lord’s Prayer

In light and in shadow, always with love. If you’re interested in a shamanic healing session, tarot card reading, my recorded meditations or to purchase any of my 4 books of poetry please click the link below. For a personalized autographed copy please send me an email and use my PayPal account for payment.
https://linktr.ee/Ladysag77
paypal.me/tinyd9